so are people wondering what to get for belated christmas presents?
here's an idea.
Dec 27, 2003
buy nothing day got nothing on this....
i suppose boxing day is like the unofficial antithesis of buy-nothing day huh? it must drive liberal and hip MIT students nuts to see all this commercialism driving the capitalist engine in seemingly mindless and sheeplike masses.
to this i say.....enh. stop bitching and do something about it. not buying anything and making your own clothes isn't gonna help the kids you're so darn worried about in indonesia. all it does serve to do is make you feel self-rightous and pretentious enough to look down at all us corporate pawns who aren't clever enough to design our own shirts out of hemp....
annnnyways, end rant/
another boxing day come and gone. surprisingly i spent the whole day shopping and technically bought nothing for myself. i DID get a bunch of stuff for other people, but we shall discuss this on a later date. the holidays seem to be flying by a little faster then i'd care to admit. before i know it this break's gonna be gone. but that's ok.....i really feel that this is nothing more than a break as opposed to a reprieve (like i usually think of my extended school breaks). i'm looking forward to getting back to london and continuing my life there as it were, as it seems more and more to me that london is where my life should be centred right now anyways.
it may not be "home" officially, but it's where i live and strive for the future, so i might as well enjoy it there.
besides. i have 250 hats to sell.....
to this i say.....enh. stop bitching and do something about it. not buying anything and making your own clothes isn't gonna help the kids you're so darn worried about in indonesia. all it does serve to do is make you feel self-rightous and pretentious enough to look down at all us corporate pawns who aren't clever enough to design our own shirts out of hemp....
annnnyways, end rant/
another boxing day come and gone. surprisingly i spent the whole day shopping and technically bought nothing for myself. i DID get a bunch of stuff for other people, but we shall discuss this on a later date. the holidays seem to be flying by a little faster then i'd care to admit. before i know it this break's gonna be gone. but that's ok.....i really feel that this is nothing more than a break as opposed to a reprieve (like i usually think of my extended school breaks). i'm looking forward to getting back to london and continuing my life there as it were, as it seems more and more to me that london is where my life should be centred right now anyways.
it may not be "home" officially, but it's where i live and strive for the future, so i might as well enjoy it there.
besides. i have 250 hats to sell.....
Dec 25, 2003
Dec 20, 2003
Dec 18, 2003
random thought of the moment:
you know how they're researching hydrogen cell technology for cars where the only final emission would be h2o?
i was thinking earlier.....if all the cars on the road were just spewing out a trail of water everywhere they went, driving conditions in the winter would probably really suck.
i bet those smart ass scientists never took THAT into account. huh? huh? did you?
yea. i didn't think so.
you know how they're researching hydrogen cell technology for cars where the only final emission would be h2o?
i was thinking earlier.....if all the cars on the road were just spewing out a trail of water everywhere they went, driving conditions in the winter would probably really suck.
i bet those smart ass scientists never took THAT into account. huh? huh? did you?
yea. i didn't think so.
appreciation
so....when i think of the word appreciation, i guess the first thought that pops into my mind is appreciation in the context of thanking someone for something. the idea that you appreciate a gesture or thought from someone else, and that they've helped you or done something for you.
i think only after this context do i think of appreciation in its broader means - the appreciation of art, the appreciation of skill, talent. appreciation as admiration, not necessarily as thanks. simply recognizing when something is worth appreciating, and understanding.
i've been thinking about the corrolation between the two meanings, and i think that it's interesting how so much of the time, we like to think there are few instances where both definitions of the word are relevant. which is odd, because really....they're the same word, aren't they?
we say to a friend "i really appreciate what you've done" and i think 90% of the time what we really mean to say is "i'm really really thankful". i'm not entirely sure, but (in my personal experience at least) we rarely take the time out to step back and really....truly appreciate things on the level of their full scope.
i mean sure, we're thankful for things, we appreciate them....but do we appreciate them in the sense that someone appreciates a piece of art? by analyzing, contextualizing, understanding and interpreting the aesthetic and intangible aura produced by it? do we appreciate to that depth of knowledge and intimacy the things we have, the things people do?
i've been realizing that so much of the time, we don't stop to consider how much we're blessed with. and i think i'm starting to realize that....i can't.....even if i tried my hardest, fully appreciate all the things in my life.....because the fact is, i don't deserve any of it. i'm a product of circumstance, and God chose to place me here for his reasons, his timing and his plan. he could have put me in africa, struggling with aids. he could have put me in indonesia, fighting against ethnic cleansing and political turmoil. he could have put me anywhere in the world, even here in this city, but in a much different situation. but he didn't. he put me here.
and trying to appreciate.....i mean, truly appreciate the things in my life. not just appreciate things when i say thank you, but really stop, stand and appreciate all thats going on around me, not necessarily with me, or concerning me.
i'm trying to fully appreciate the depths of my relationships, the memories i have, the moments i'm making. i'm trying to fully appreciate everything that i appreciate. to understand at more than face value not just that i AM thankful for things in life, but WHY i'm thankful for them. and it's a great experience, because i find it makes things so much easier to understand....
so....when i think of the word appreciation, i guess the first thought that pops into my mind is appreciation in the context of thanking someone for something. the idea that you appreciate a gesture or thought from someone else, and that they've helped you or done something for you.
i think only after this context do i think of appreciation in its broader means - the appreciation of art, the appreciation of skill, talent. appreciation as admiration, not necessarily as thanks. simply recognizing when something is worth appreciating, and understanding.
i've been thinking about the corrolation between the two meanings, and i think that it's interesting how so much of the time, we like to think there are few instances where both definitions of the word are relevant. which is odd, because really....they're the same word, aren't they?
we say to a friend "i really appreciate what you've done" and i think 90% of the time what we really mean to say is "i'm really really thankful". i'm not entirely sure, but (in my personal experience at least) we rarely take the time out to step back and really....truly appreciate things on the level of their full scope.
i mean sure, we're thankful for things, we appreciate them....but do we appreciate them in the sense that someone appreciates a piece of art? by analyzing, contextualizing, understanding and interpreting the aesthetic and intangible aura produced by it? do we appreciate to that depth of knowledge and intimacy the things we have, the things people do?
i've been realizing that so much of the time, we don't stop to consider how much we're blessed with. and i think i'm starting to realize that....i can't.....even if i tried my hardest, fully appreciate all the things in my life.....because the fact is, i don't deserve any of it. i'm a product of circumstance, and God chose to place me here for his reasons, his timing and his plan. he could have put me in africa, struggling with aids. he could have put me in indonesia, fighting against ethnic cleansing and political turmoil. he could have put me anywhere in the world, even here in this city, but in a much different situation. but he didn't. he put me here.
and trying to appreciate.....i mean, truly appreciate the things in my life. not just appreciate things when i say thank you, but really stop, stand and appreciate all thats going on around me, not necessarily with me, or concerning me.
i'm trying to fully appreciate the depths of my relationships, the memories i have, the moments i'm making. i'm trying to fully appreciate everything that i appreciate. to understand at more than face value not just that i AM thankful for things in life, but WHY i'm thankful for them. and it's a great experience, because i find it makes things so much easier to understand....
Dec 16, 2003
dreams realized
you know, i've always wanted a television in my room. i remember i used to have one when i was in kindergarden....i used to watch carebears as my dad helped me get dressed in the morning.
alas, those days are long gone. i spent my adolescent and teenage years longing....wishing, dreaming about having a television in my room, but space was prohibitive in my last house.
but....now......now the dream has become a reality.
i know other people have tv's in their room, but.....uh....well.....shutup. this is my moment.
alas, those days are long gone. i spent my adolescent and teenage years longing....wishing, dreaming about having a television in my room, but space was prohibitive in my last house.
but....now......now the dream has become a reality.
i know other people have tv's in their room, but.....uh....well.....shutup. this is my moment.
Dec 15, 2003
what a few days its been. a new PM and saddam captured.
in other news, i moved into my new house yesterday. it was pretty tiring, but we're starting to settle into the new digs and cleaning up our mess. our living room is still just a pile of furniture, we've been too lazy to arrange anything thusfar, so if anyone wants to play aspiring interior decorator, let me know and you can come by and tell us how to arrange all our rooms. si? si.
also, i got baptized this morning despite some early....uhh.....setbacks, haha
it was a beautiful winter morning (well, maybe not for the driving part) but all things asides, i'm really thankful for everyone who showed up, everyone who's wished me well, and the giant stack of books i now have to amuse and enlighten me. thanks everybody, a guy couldn't ask for better friends.
now cue the full house music and audience "awwww....."
in other news, i moved into my new house yesterday. it was pretty tiring, but we're starting to settle into the new digs and cleaning up our mess. our living room is still just a pile of furniture, we've been too lazy to arrange anything thusfar, so if anyone wants to play aspiring interior decorator, let me know and you can come by and tell us how to arrange all our rooms. si? si.
also, i got baptized this morning despite some early....uhh.....setbacks, haha
it was a beautiful winter morning (well, maybe not for the driving part) but all things asides, i'm really thankful for everyone who showed up, everyone who's wished me well, and the giant stack of books i now have to amuse and enlighten me. thanks everybody, a guy couldn't ask for better friends.
now cue the full house music and audience "awwww....."
Dec 10, 2003
Powell 'appoints' soul legend James Brown to new diplomatic post
you know, there aren't too many things in the world that could make a grown man giggle.
this is one of them.
yes, i'm using my newly aquired freedom to.....surf the net.....hm, maybe i should go do something i haven't had a chance to do in the last two weeks. like....sleep....
this is one of them.
yes, i'm using my newly aquired freedom to.....surf the net.....hm, maybe i should go do something i haven't had a chance to do in the last two weeks. like....sleep....
Dec 8, 2003
Vita! Boisson A La Mangue!
no more due dates for the year. i am rather relieved.
this term really flew by.
i wonder how we each tend to judge the relative value of each term of our lives? by academic performance? social satisfaction? good balance in all areas of our lives?
if anything, i think i've been pleased by my non....apathy, this term. i've still hated school, but i've trudged to class more often, submitted more assignments on time, and studied a little bit harder than i would care to admit sometimes. on top of everything, i had a good time this term. lots of fun, lots of memories, lots of lessons learned......although i realize my school efforts have improved, they still leave much to be desired. but enh. everyone's gotta have goals, no?
upwards and onwards.
classes missed this term: ~20
days spent sleeping past noon: ~40
assignments submited on time: 8
assignments submited late: 3
litres of pop consumed: ~50
albums purchased: 5
meals missed: ~120
hats purchased off ebay: ~260
hats sold after ebay purchase: 0
trips back to toronto: 6
mice killed: 0
courses dropped: 0
classes failed: 0
i love my mouse free home.
this term really flew by.
i wonder how we each tend to judge the relative value of each term of our lives? by academic performance? social satisfaction? good balance in all areas of our lives?
if anything, i think i've been pleased by my non....apathy, this term. i've still hated school, but i've trudged to class more often, submitted more assignments on time, and studied a little bit harder than i would care to admit sometimes. on top of everything, i had a good time this term. lots of fun, lots of memories, lots of lessons learned......although i realize my school efforts have improved, they still leave much to be desired. but enh. everyone's gotta have goals, no?
upwards and onwards.
classes missed this term: ~20
days spent sleeping past noon: ~40
assignments submited on time: 8
assignments submited late: 3
litres of pop consumed: ~50
albums purchased: 5
meals missed: ~120
hats purchased off ebay: ~260
hats sold after ebay purchase: 0
trips back to toronto: 6
mice killed: 0
courses dropped: 0
classes failed: 0
i love my mouse free home.
Dec 6, 2003
Philosophy Games
this site is just a bunch of interactive games concerning philosophy, religion, rational thinking and the like. it sounds boring, but if you're into philosophy or even just pure intellectual stimulation via rational thinking process', you might find this amusing. i sure did.
my personal favourite is "battlegroundGod".
i took one hit and bit no bullets. yay.
my personal favourite is "battlegroundGod".
i took one hit and bit no bullets. yay.
Dec 5, 2003
Broken Social Scene - Dec. 4th, 2003
twofold update - removed picture of tina so she won't kill me.
also, so i can show off my spiffy pictures from the BSS concert. it was an absolutely amazing show. first some context - this show is actually the second of a back-to-back; they played yesterday night as well. it's all in an effort to raise money for a charity called the george herman house, for women in toronto who are in transitional periods of their lives. so not only was it a great show, but it was for a great cause.
metric opened, a band fronted by Emily Haines (the female vocals on the BSS track 'Anthems for a Seventeen Year-Old Girl'). they're not bad.....but i found her voice to actually get a bit annoying after a while. the band really shines musically when she focuses on playing the synths and they really just jam in the typical prog-indie rock climax attaining swell that is all the rage now-a-days. less is definitely more in this situation.
broken social scene were......AMAZING. production values, energy levels, enthusiasm and overall professionalism were all evident, and the crowd was extremely hyped and intelligent. all factors combined to make for an amazing 2 hour set, including every song off of their LP 'you forgot it in people' ending in an absolutely blow-your-mind performance of the aforementioned "anthems...." that featured pretty much everyone and their little dogs crowding the stage with 6 guitarists, 2 female vocals, an 8 piece brass section, and various other guests here and there. it was......near sonic perfection.
to cap it all off, returning for their encore, they were accompanied by special guest, Hayden who proceeded to perform.....some song....that frankly i'm unsure of the origins of. oh well, it was good.
and...as you can see by the picture.....the disco ball and stars were a very nice touch to the ambiance. all in all, one of the better shows i've been to this year. naturally, ranking behind bjork, but well ahead of even the death cab show several weeks back. very much worth the 20 bucks and wait in the cold weather. i'm not sure when these guys are gonna have the time to get together and play another toronto show, but if they do, i highly highly HIGHLY suggest you make it out to catch them. i promise you won't regret it.
also, so i can show off my spiffy pictures from the BSS concert. it was an absolutely amazing show. first some context - this show is actually the second of a back-to-back; they played yesterday night as well. it's all in an effort to raise money for a charity called the george herman house, for women in toronto who are in transitional periods of their lives. so not only was it a great show, but it was for a great cause.
metric opened, a band fronted by Emily Haines (the female vocals on the BSS track 'Anthems for a Seventeen Year-Old Girl'). they're not bad.....but i found her voice to actually get a bit annoying after a while. the band really shines musically when she focuses on playing the synths and they really just jam in the typical prog-indie rock climax attaining swell that is all the rage now-a-days. less is definitely more in this situation.
broken social scene were......AMAZING. production values, energy levels, enthusiasm and overall professionalism were all evident, and the crowd was extremely hyped and intelligent. all factors combined to make for an amazing 2 hour set, including every song off of their LP 'you forgot it in people' ending in an absolutely blow-your-mind performance of the aforementioned "anthems...." that featured pretty much everyone and their little dogs crowding the stage with 6 guitarists, 2 female vocals, an 8 piece brass section, and various other guests here and there. it was......near sonic perfection.
to cap it all off, returning for their encore, they were accompanied by special guest, Hayden who proceeded to perform.....some song....that frankly i'm unsure of the origins of. oh well, it was good.
and...as you can see by the picture.....the disco ball and stars were a very nice touch to the ambiance. all in all, one of the better shows i've been to this year. naturally, ranking behind bjork, but well ahead of even the death cab show several weeks back. very much worth the 20 bucks and wait in the cold weather. i'm not sure when these guys are gonna have the time to get together and play another toronto show, but if they do, i highly highly HIGHLY suggest you make it out to catch them. i promise you won't regret it.
Dec 3, 2003
TheStar.com - Jays sign Taiwanese pitcher
i didn't know people even played baseball in taiwan. oh well. it'd be awful cool if he eventually made it up to the big show for a few innings next year. it would probably double the crowds at the skydome.
can you imagine if he's good looking? girls from all over the city would take a sudden interest in the jays.......
i didn't know people even played baseball in taiwan. oh well. it'd be awful cool if he eventually made it up to the big show for a few innings next year. it would probably double the crowds at the skydome.
can you imagine if he's good looking? girls from all over the city would take a sudden interest in the jays.......
Dec 2, 2003
CBC News: Deadline Iraq - Uncensored Stories of the War - Resources
i saw this documentary on CBC:Newsworld last week, and i highly suggest that if anyone get the chance to sit down and watch it that they do so.
it details the stories of journalists and cameramen working in Iraq during the war last year, and it really shows the side of war that you never see. not from the opinion of a soldier, or some sort of biased view, but through the relatively objective eyes of the news.
they talk about all the stuff the army wouldn't let them say during the war, and they tell the real stories of what war is like reporting from the very midst of it. stories of innocent lives killed, civilians injured and the ramifications and consequences to the country that are never given a second thought here in the comfort of north america.
i saw this documentary on CBC:Newsworld last week, and i highly suggest that if anyone get the chance to sit down and watch it that they do so.
it details the stories of journalists and cameramen working in Iraq during the war last year, and it really shows the side of war that you never see. not from the opinion of a soldier, or some sort of biased view, but through the relatively objective eyes of the news.
they talk about all the stuff the army wouldn't let them say during the war, and they tell the real stories of what war is like reporting from the very midst of it. stories of innocent lives killed, civilians injured and the ramifications and consequences to the country that are never given a second thought here in the comfort of north america.
Dec 1, 2003
Psalm 19
"14 May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart
be pleasing in your sight,
O Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer."
May the words of my mouth,
And the meditations of my heart,
Be pleasing to You,
Pleasing to You.
May the words of my mouth,
And the meditations of my heart,
Be pleasing to You, my God.
You're my Rock and my Redeemer,
You're the reason that I sing.
I desire to be a blessing,
In Your eyes,
Every hour, every moment,
Lord I want to be your servant,
I desire to be a blessing,
In Your eyes,
In Your eyes.
i've been posting a lot of song lyrics lately...i think the best part about songs is the knowledge and comfort that you're sharing in the same experience as someone else.
i've had this song in my mind all week....no particular reason why, i haven't sung it anywhere in a while but it's just been constantly popping into my head. the peace of God's mercy is overwhelming joy. it's like.....
yum.
be pleasing in your sight,
O Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer."
May the words of my mouth,
And the meditations of my heart,
Be pleasing to You,
Pleasing to You.
May the words of my mouth,
And the meditations of my heart,
Be pleasing to You, my God.
You're my Rock and my Redeemer,
You're the reason that I sing.
I desire to be a blessing,
In Your eyes,
Every hour, every moment,
Lord I want to be your servant,
I desire to be a blessing,
In Your eyes,
In Your eyes.
i've been posting a lot of song lyrics lately...i think the best part about songs is the knowledge and comfort that you're sharing in the same experience as someone else.
i've had this song in my mind all week....no particular reason why, i haven't sung it anywhere in a while but it's just been constantly popping into my head. the peace of God's mercy is overwhelming joy. it's like.....
yum.
Nov 30, 2003
"I Am Jack's Younger Self"
i don't think i know anyone who isn't a fan of calvin and hobbes (strangely enough whom i referenced in my previous, more romanticized post). with that in mind, i now present to you a brilliant piece of work by one Mr. Galvin B. Chow that analyzes and explains the relationship between Calvin and Hobbes, and the movie Fight Club; irrefutably coming to the conclusion that indeed, Edward Norton plays none other than a grown up and jaded Calvin, while the imaginary Tyler Durden is the ravaged yet still influential remains of Hobbes in the darker recesses of Calvin's twisted adult mind.
enjoy.
The Secret Connections between "Fight Club" and "Calvin and Hobbes" REVEALED!
enjoy.
The Secret Connections between "Fight Club" and "Calvin and Hobbes" REVEALED!
i should be working...
i love it when the world is covered by the pure serenity of a blanket of fresh, powdered snow. not the heavy stuff that just turns into grey slush and dirty snowbanks, but the gentle confectioners sugar type of snow that just manages to cover the final hint of green on the ground, and transforms the outside from dull and drab to bright and new. greeting us in the morning as a simple reminder of how awesome it is to wake up everyday to a fresh start - a new day - and a world of possibilities and opportunities (c&h?). mistakes are forgotten, and replaced by the pureness of hope. blank slates, empty canvas' and white mornings of snow. all exciting for the same reason.
there's nothing quite as peaceful as lying alone in a snowy field.
that is - until someone runs over you with a snowblower.
then its personal.
also, ever notice that when people are cold, they tend to walk faster? it makes you wonder why there are so many fat people in cold climates huh? santa should be the fittest guy in the whole world. maybe it's all the milk and cookies he eats.
countdown until hats arrive: t-minus 2 weeks approx.
there's nothing quite as peaceful as lying alone in a snowy field.
that is - until someone runs over you with a snowblower.
then its personal.
also, ever notice that when people are cold, they tend to walk faster? it makes you wonder why there are so many fat people in cold climates huh? santa should be the fittest guy in the whole world. maybe it's all the milk and cookies he eats.
countdown until hats arrive: t-minus 2 weeks approx.
Nov 28, 2003
Nov 26, 2003
Nov 25, 2003
just another manic monday......
yes, i realize today is tuesday.
but yesterday was monday. and now that today is tuesday, it marks the end of possibly the absolutely most surreal week of my life.
i can't even begin to describe all that's happened over the last week, and what all of it has meant to me, and to those around me. there's so much about myself that i'm growing to understand, and so much more being revealed to me that i know i have to look closer at, and examine harder in order to finish the work that has been started in me.
at the same time, it seems like everyone around me has been equally contributing to the wonderment of the past seven days. friends have been amazing, the oddest most strange and yet pleasantly surprising things have just.....happened with friends, or between me and others. it's been a week where i've not just been blown away on the inside, but that everything around me seems to have been having interesting experiences too, seemingly unrelated to my own yet strangely connected in the greater scheme of things.
you know, sometimes you hear people say God is good. or God is faithful. and you think - well, alright. Because in your mind, that's not even a possibility, for "God" is an abstract. something you don't know, can't comprehend, or don't care to or need to.
but like.....when you finally experience how powerful His love for us can be. it's crazy. because for the longest time in the back of my mind, i thought maybe i was crazy for believing in Him, for trusting Him, and i second guessed myself every once in a while. but i kept plugging away. and i tried to find God. and now...at this point.....i can honestly say that i think i'd be crazy not to trust Him. He found me. and He's undeniable in my mind, in my heart. and that feels like.....no words can describe.
i read my post from one week ago exactly. on November 17th, and the context in which i wrote that post, and the events that have transpired in the week since then....even that very night...and wow. just....wow.
and i know that really, these past 7 days aren't symbolic of an end.
but merely a beginning.
but yesterday was monday. and now that today is tuesday, it marks the end of possibly the absolutely most surreal week of my life.
i can't even begin to describe all that's happened over the last week, and what all of it has meant to me, and to those around me. there's so much about myself that i'm growing to understand, and so much more being revealed to me that i know i have to look closer at, and examine harder in order to finish the work that has been started in me.
at the same time, it seems like everyone around me has been equally contributing to the wonderment of the past seven days. friends have been amazing, the oddest most strange and yet pleasantly surprising things have just.....happened with friends, or between me and others. it's been a week where i've not just been blown away on the inside, but that everything around me seems to have been having interesting experiences too, seemingly unrelated to my own yet strangely connected in the greater scheme of things.
you know, sometimes you hear people say God is good. or God is faithful. and you think - well, alright. Because in your mind, that's not even a possibility, for "God" is an abstract. something you don't know, can't comprehend, or don't care to or need to.
but like.....when you finally experience how powerful His love for us can be. it's crazy. because for the longest time in the back of my mind, i thought maybe i was crazy for believing in Him, for trusting Him, and i second guessed myself every once in a while. but i kept plugging away. and i tried to find God. and now...at this point.....i can honestly say that i think i'd be crazy not to trust Him. He found me. and He's undeniable in my mind, in my heart. and that feels like.....no words can describe.
i read my post from one week ago exactly. on November 17th, and the context in which i wrote that post, and the events that have transpired in the week since then....even that very night...and wow. just....wow.
and i know that really, these past 7 days aren't symbolic of an end.
but merely a beginning.
Nov 23, 2003
Quite Possibly, The Worst Disguise Ever
this news story is hillarious.
i mean. there's desperate people. then there's just stupid people.
this guy is just stupid.
on an unrelated note, does anyone else find stereotypes, be they racial, ethnic, religious, asthetic.....all hillarious? i don't know why we try so hard to avoid them, they're the source of all our best jokes.
i think i'd be perfectly fine and dandy if instead of avoiding stereotypes we just embraced them as humourous aspects of our daily lives.
like....a job interview with a black guy hoping to get a job and a white guy holding the interview would lose all its poltical weight and stress.
instead of worrying about offending the guy, the white guy could just be like.....i was gonna hire you. but then those women over in that corner of the office are scared of you because they think you're a criminal. then the black guy could all be like - yea? well i'm gonna sue you for racial discrimination. then the white guy could all be like, haha, that's jokes dawg. don't be trippin. cole me down on the patti side. and the black guy would be like, word.
or say i'm in a restaurant, and my waiter comes up to take my order and says, oh, by the way! don't tip like a cheap bastard! and i could all be like, hahahahaha, alright, just as long as you remember you're serving ME and that's the way it will be when my 1.2 billion bredren take over the world! then we'd all get a good laugh and probably share a few drinks once he gets off work.
see? no trepidation, no side-stepping, just let it all hang out.
wouldn't that be great? cuz i mean, in the end, aren't we all the same on the inside?
please don't think i'm racist. i'm just totally insensitive to the politically correct. there's a fine line. i like to think i straddle it well.
heh....heh....i said straddle.....
i mean. there's desperate people. then there's just stupid people.
this guy is just stupid.
on an unrelated note, does anyone else find stereotypes, be they racial, ethnic, religious, asthetic.....all hillarious? i don't know why we try so hard to avoid them, they're the source of all our best jokes.
i think i'd be perfectly fine and dandy if instead of avoiding stereotypes we just embraced them as humourous aspects of our daily lives.
like....a job interview with a black guy hoping to get a job and a white guy holding the interview would lose all its poltical weight and stress.
instead of worrying about offending the guy, the white guy could just be like.....i was gonna hire you. but then those women over in that corner of the office are scared of you because they think you're a criminal. then the black guy could all be like - yea? well i'm gonna sue you for racial discrimination. then the white guy could all be like, haha, that's jokes dawg. don't be trippin. cole me down on the patti side. and the black guy would be like, word.
or say i'm in a restaurant, and my waiter comes up to take my order and says, oh, by the way! don't tip like a cheap bastard! and i could all be like, hahahahaha, alright, just as long as you remember you're serving ME and that's the way it will be when my 1.2 billion bredren take over the world! then we'd all get a good laugh and probably share a few drinks once he gets off work.
see? no trepidation, no side-stepping, just let it all hang out.
wouldn't that be great? cuz i mean, in the end, aren't we all the same on the inside?
please don't think i'm racist. i'm just totally insensitive to the politically correct. there's a fine line. i like to think i straddle it well.
heh....heh....i said straddle.....
i've got a lovely bunch of coconuts....
i'm having a good day.
bought a bunch of cd's yesterday for 10 bucks each. relative steals...a used copy of p5's 'the fifth album from Matador', a brand-new copy of rufus wainwrights 'want one' and a used copy of dj shadow's 'endtroducing'. i've been looking to buy back endtroducing for months and months now, to find it for 10 bucks is awesome! not to mention the brand new rufus cd. it's on SALE for 13 bucks at futureshop, regularly 18 bucks.
cd's make me happy.
ALSO, i finally got a reply from the guy who i bought all those stupid hats from. EXTRA happy. 250 caps here i come baby!
then i spent all night today hanging out with the HYPE kids at lcac, and got to actually learn some of their names. it's kind of cool. i've been at lcac a while now, and probably will be for another 2 years or so at least. it's about time i got to know some of the kids i think.
overall a pretty long and tiring few days. but i'm feeling strangely full of energy.
bought a bunch of cd's yesterday for 10 bucks each. relative steals...a used copy of p5's 'the fifth album from Matador', a brand-new copy of rufus wainwrights 'want one' and a used copy of dj shadow's 'endtroducing'. i've been looking to buy back endtroducing for months and months now, to find it for 10 bucks is awesome! not to mention the brand new rufus cd. it's on SALE for 13 bucks at futureshop, regularly 18 bucks.
cd's make me happy.
ALSO, i finally got a reply from the guy who i bought all those stupid hats from. EXTRA happy. 250 caps here i come baby!
then i spent all night today hanging out with the HYPE kids at lcac, and got to actually learn some of their names. it's kind of cool. i've been at lcac a while now, and probably will be for another 2 years or so at least. it's about time i got to know some of the kids i think.
overall a pretty long and tiring few days. but i'm feeling strangely full of energy.
Nov 21, 2003
my little coil notebook.
inconspicuous in nature
you sit by my bed
waiting for me to fill your pages
with joy, with grief, with fears and hopes
you know me well
you've been my shoulder so often
more than i'd care to admit
oh my little coil notebook
you're running out of pages
i'll be sad to see you go
but take heart
your severance package is
surprisingly good
you sit by my bed
waiting for me to fill your pages
with joy, with grief, with fears and hopes
you know me well
you've been my shoulder so often
more than i'd care to admit
oh my little coil notebook
you're running out of pages
i'll be sad to see you go
but take heart
your severance package is
surprisingly good
Nov 20, 2003
you have led me to the sadness
i have carried this pain
on a back bruised, nearly broken
I'm crying out to You
i will sing of your mercy
that leads me through valleys of sorry
to rivers of joy
when death like a gypsy
comes to steal what i love
i will still look to the heavens
i will still seek your face
but i fear you aren't listening
because there are no words
just the stillness and the hunger
for a faith that assures
alleluia, alleluia, alleluia, alleluia
while we wait for rescue
with our eyes tightly shut
face to the ground using our hands
to cover the fatal cut
though the pain is an ocean
tossing us around, around, around
you have calmed greater waters
higher mountains have come down
i have carried this pain
on a back bruised, nearly broken
I'm crying out to You
i will sing of your mercy
that leads me through valleys of sorry
to rivers of joy
when death like a gypsy
comes to steal what i love
i will still look to the heavens
i will still seek your face
but i fear you aren't listening
because there are no words
just the stillness and the hunger
for a faith that assures
alleluia, alleluia, alleluia, alleluia
while we wait for rescue
with our eyes tightly shut
face to the ground using our hands
to cover the fatal cut
though the pain is an ocean
tossing us around, around, around
you have calmed greater waters
higher mountains have come down
Nov 19, 2003
Sometimes you are in a cave, and no human action is able to get you out. There is something you can't fix, can't heal, or cna't escape, and all you can do is trust God. Finding ultimate refuge in God means you become so immersed in his presence, so convinced of his goodness, so devoted to his lordship that you find even the cave is a perfectly safe place to be because he is there with you...Sooner or later, everybody logs some time in the cave. So when your time comes, just remember one thing: God does some of his best work in caves
- John Ortberg
There is a hope that is real. Painful as it is, difficult to comprehend as it is, there is joy in taking up our crosses and following Jesus. The pain is washed away by the knowledge that God is here, and He acknowledges that we have come to worship him.
- John Ortberg
There is a hope that is real. Painful as it is, difficult to comprehend as it is, there is joy in taking up our crosses and following Jesus. The pain is washed away by the knowledge that God is here, and He acknowledges that we have come to worship him.
Nov 18, 2003
Worlds Apart - Jars of Clay
I am the only one to blame for this
Somehow it all adds up the same
Soaring on the wings of selfish pride
I flew too high and like Icarus I collide
With a world I try so hard to leave behind
To rid myself of all but love
To give and die
To turn away and not become
Another nail to pierce the skin of one who loves
More deeply than the oceans,
More abundant than the tear
Of a world embracing every heartache
Can I be the one to sacrifice
Or grip the spear and watch the blood and water flow
To love you - take my world apart
To need you - I am on my knees
To love you - take my world apart
To need you - broken on my knees
All said and done I stand alone
Amongst remains of a life I should not own
It takes all I am to believe
In the mercy that covers me
Did you really have to die for me?
All I am for all you are
Because what I need and what I believe are worlds apart
I look beyond the empty cross
Forgetting what my life has cost
And wipe away the crimson stains
And dull the nails that still remain
More and more I need you now,
I owe you more each passing hour
The battle between grace and pride
I gave up not so long ago
So steal my heart and take the pain
And wash the feet and cleanse my pride
Take the selfish, take the weak,
And all the things I cannot hide
Take the beauty, take my tears
The sin - soaked heart and make it yours
Take my world all apart
Take it now, take it now
And serve the ones that I despise
Speak the words I can't deny
Watch the world I used to love
Fall to dust and thrown away
I look beyond the empty cross
Forgetting what my life has cost
So wipe away the crimson stains
And dull the nails that still remain
So steal my heart and take the pain
Take the selfish, take the weak
And all the things I cannot hide
Take the beauty, take my tears
Take my world apart, take my world apart
I pray, I pray, I pray
Take my world apart
Somehow it all adds up the same
Soaring on the wings of selfish pride
I flew too high and like Icarus I collide
With a world I try so hard to leave behind
To rid myself of all but love
To give and die
To turn away and not become
Another nail to pierce the skin of one who loves
More deeply than the oceans,
More abundant than the tear
Of a world embracing every heartache
Can I be the one to sacrifice
Or grip the spear and watch the blood and water flow
To love you - take my world apart
To need you - I am on my knees
To love you - take my world apart
To need you - broken on my knees
All said and done I stand alone
Amongst remains of a life I should not own
It takes all I am to believe
In the mercy that covers me
Did you really have to die for me?
All I am for all you are
Because what I need and what I believe are worlds apart
I look beyond the empty cross
Forgetting what my life has cost
And wipe away the crimson stains
And dull the nails that still remain
More and more I need you now,
I owe you more each passing hour
The battle between grace and pride
I gave up not so long ago
So steal my heart and take the pain
And wash the feet and cleanse my pride
Take the selfish, take the weak,
And all the things I cannot hide
Take the beauty, take my tears
The sin - soaked heart and make it yours
Take my world all apart
Take it now, take it now
And serve the ones that I despise
Speak the words I can't deny
Watch the world I used to love
Fall to dust and thrown away
I look beyond the empty cross
Forgetting what my life has cost
So wipe away the crimson stains
And dull the nails that still remain
So steal my heart and take the pain
Take the selfish, take the weak
And all the things I cannot hide
Take the beauty, take my tears
Take my world apart, take my world apart
I pray, I pray, I pray
Take my world apart
Nov 17, 2003
there is frustration involved in many aspects of life.
something i've been thinking about recently is the frustration of faith.
trusting God...IN God, has never come easily for me. it has been a struggle against my own logic, my own rationale, my fear, my pride. but never....never has God given up on me. without fail, everytime i've thrown my hands up in defeat, in indifference and disgust, God has come along on His own time - by His own means - and reeled my back in. i've constantly struggled with having to seek God...forcing His hand, test Him and baiting Him.
i still struggle with it. i find myself extraordinarily inadequate, and i see my own inequities as insurmountable. it's frustrating. it's frustrating spending so much time wanting, needing, praying to know God, and when you know God, feeling so insincere because you can't live up to what it demands.
I feel like i can't do it sometimes. that every time i screw up, every turn i turn my back from God it loses it's meaning. i've been here before, messed up before, asked for forgiveness before.
and i know all the cliche's. i know that not trusting him is bad, obviously. but i've also realized that if it were easy, it probably would mean nothing to me. If God had revealed himself to me without my arduous soul searching, if God had given me everything i sought of Him on a silver platter, i would probably have no respect for Him.
it's the humbleness that sometimes i overlook, the importance of just shutting up and listening. of recognizing when God's talking to me and letting Him talk instead of drowning Him out with my own whining and self-loathing and self-pity.
yea. it's frustrating. and i find myself apologizing a lot. saying sorry for a lot of the things i do, or fail to do.
but i'm learning. my expectations were for God to transform me into a perfect person overnight. My standards are high.....my expectations are high, but maybe i shouldn't be surprised when i fail i guess. it's not my job to be succesful in changing me. that's up to God. my role is just in staying faithful enough to let him do it. and for this i'm thankful.
i've said a lot of things to a lot of people, but ultimately when it comes to relating it to my own life, i feel i always forget my own words. things i've said, things that have been said through me by Him to others. i really shouldn't. sometimes they're good words.
anyways, this has been awfully personal and revealing. i guess what i'm trying to say, is that i'm going to be getting baptized on december 14th at Scarborough Chinese Alliance Church. i'd be extremely pleased if you would all join me. (even if i don't know you, i'd love to meet you there)
outy.
something i've been thinking about recently is the frustration of faith.
trusting God...IN God, has never come easily for me. it has been a struggle against my own logic, my own rationale, my fear, my pride. but never....never has God given up on me. without fail, everytime i've thrown my hands up in defeat, in indifference and disgust, God has come along on His own time - by His own means - and reeled my back in. i've constantly struggled with having to seek God...forcing His hand, test Him and baiting Him.
i still struggle with it. i find myself extraordinarily inadequate, and i see my own inequities as insurmountable. it's frustrating. it's frustrating spending so much time wanting, needing, praying to know God, and when you know God, feeling so insincere because you can't live up to what it demands.
I feel like i can't do it sometimes. that every time i screw up, every turn i turn my back from God it loses it's meaning. i've been here before, messed up before, asked for forgiveness before.
and i know all the cliche's. i know that not trusting him is bad, obviously. but i've also realized that if it were easy, it probably would mean nothing to me. If God had revealed himself to me without my arduous soul searching, if God had given me everything i sought of Him on a silver platter, i would probably have no respect for Him.
it's the humbleness that sometimes i overlook, the importance of just shutting up and listening. of recognizing when God's talking to me and letting Him talk instead of drowning Him out with my own whining and self-loathing and self-pity.
yea. it's frustrating. and i find myself apologizing a lot. saying sorry for a lot of the things i do, or fail to do.
but i'm learning. my expectations were for God to transform me into a perfect person overnight. My standards are high.....my expectations are high, but maybe i shouldn't be surprised when i fail i guess. it's not my job to be succesful in changing me. that's up to God. my role is just in staying faithful enough to let him do it. and for this i'm thankful.
i've said a lot of things to a lot of people, but ultimately when it comes to relating it to my own life, i feel i always forget my own words. things i've said, things that have been said through me by Him to others. i really shouldn't. sometimes they're good words.
anyways, this has been awfully personal and revealing. i guess what i'm trying to say, is that i'm going to be getting baptized on december 14th at Scarborough Chinese Alliance Church. i'd be extremely pleased if you would all join me. (even if i don't know you, i'd love to meet you there)
outy.
Nov 16, 2003
i've had a rather interesting night. first of all, i'm ecstatic that i won an ebay auction i really wanted. you can see my amazing find HERE!
if anyone wants to buy a hat, let me know.....i'm buying them to sell them, hahahaha
so me and herb were watching the outdoor life network, and we saw this show where this guy took a leak into a glass, then chugged it. it was.....like watching a car wreck.......
then right after that retarded british show, there was a show called "red light districts". we're not watching it, but any respect i had for OLN is quickly fading away.....apparently the amazing race just isn't cutting it ratings wise
if anyone wants to buy a hat, let me know.....i'm buying them to sell them, hahahaha
so me and herb were watching the outdoor life network, and we saw this show where this guy took a leak into a glass, then chugged it. it was.....like watching a car wreck.......
then right after that retarded british show, there was a show called "red light districts". we're not watching it, but any respect i had for OLN is quickly fading away.....apparently the amazing race just isn't cutting it ratings wise
i bought the Jars of Clay double album this weekend, 'Furthermore'. One cd is acoustic studio remixes of old classics and 3 new songs, while the other disc is a live cd.
i think i had really forgotten how much i like Jars. they were one of my absolute favourite bands back in grade 7-10, when i listened to nothing but weezer, jars and nirvana. that's a strange trio now that i think about it, but enh....
i'm starting to get pretty anxious about moving into my new house.
brand spanking new kitchen, here i come....mmmm....
i think i had really forgotten how much i like Jars. they were one of my absolute favourite bands back in grade 7-10, when i listened to nothing but weezer, jars and nirvana. that's a strange trio now that i think about it, but enh....
i'm starting to get pretty anxious about moving into my new house.
brand spanking new kitchen, here i come....mmmm....
Nov 10, 2003
hm....so my essay's a day late, but i'm slowly making progress.
i'm working with my laptop in front of the tv, with my wireless mooching off some poor souls bandwidth in our townhouse complex.
i must say work doesn't seem quite as bad when i'm not cooped up in a hole forcing myself to do it....late or not, i prefer this environment to my typical one. i could get used to this.
as an aside, i find myself watching an awful lot of oprah recently.
this is a disturbing turn of events that i attest to the fact that i'm always home when it's on.
i'm working with my laptop in front of the tv, with my wireless mooching off some poor souls bandwidth in our townhouse complex.
i must say work doesn't seem quite as bad when i'm not cooped up in a hole forcing myself to do it....late or not, i prefer this environment to my typical one. i could get used to this.
as an aside, i find myself watching an awful lot of oprah recently.
this is a disturbing turn of events that i attest to the fact that i'm always home when it's on.
Nov 7, 2003
why are cd's still so expensive?
why are the cheap cd's still so crappy?
why is having good taste in music so cost-prohibitive?
all these, and other questions on:
america's most wanted.
i think that shows pretty funny. i wonder if criminals are ever like, watching tv, and all of a sudden they see themeselves on AMW, and get all excited. like, calling up their other criminal buddies going "dude dude! turn to channel 28! - i MADE IT man! i finally made it!"
it's like the major leagues of fugitives.
well, if i was a fugitive, at least that's what i would think.
why are the cheap cd's still so crappy?
why is having good taste in music so cost-prohibitive?
all these, and other questions on:
america's most wanted.
i think that shows pretty funny. i wonder if criminals are ever like, watching tv, and all of a sudden they see themeselves on AMW, and get all excited. like, calling up their other criminal buddies going "dude dude! turn to channel 28! - i MADE IT man! i finally made it!"
it's like the major leagues of fugitives.
well, if i was a fugitive, at least that's what i would think.
Nov 3, 2003
birthdays are like farts.
they're fun while they last, but the real joy is in the aftermath.
first off....i had such a great weekend. it was full of friends and fun. kind of a departure from my regular birthday routine of lazing around the house (which coincidentally is actually my favourite past-time). i'm totally blessed beyond anything i deserve, and thanks to all u guys that called or icq'd me, i really appreciate it. also, i just want to reitterate to the world that i have the best girlfriend EVAR. so SUCKS FOR YOU rest of the world. booyah.
now that all that mushy stuff is through, lets move on....
i guess the inevitable aspect about birthdays is that you realize you're a year older. or as i like to think - one year closer to dying. yeehaw! i guess in some respects it's a little sad. i'm officially into my twenties. then again, i think it's kind of cool that i'm into my twenties. i think when i was young, like....12.....i wasn't even capable of picturing myself as being a twenty-something. that reality seemed so ridiculous and distant that i never even bothered imagining what it would be like. sort of like how i could never imagine what it's going to be like when i'm 50 now. it's this frame of time that's so far away you don't even bother giving it any serious thought. but hey! look at this. i'm here. i'm 21.
i think the single most shocking thing in hindsight isn't that i'm old....but that it's all happened so fast. it's like that scene in monty python's search for the holy grail where lancelot? whatever. one of them knight people is running across a field, and two soldiers look through a telescope and see him waaaay in the distance running towards them to attack. then when they cut back to the soldiers, he's like, running right into the scene and kills them. that's sort of how i feel. the years keep flying by, and i guess it's not a matter of "oh crap, i'm old" but it's more like "what the hell? when did this happen...?".
is life any different now? well....no. is it ever? i think i'm surprised by how quick, yet at the same time, how gradually life has been moseying along. it seems like in the blink of an eye i'm 21. yet there hasn't been any real dramatic changes....no coming of age stories to tell.....no tales of reckless youth maturing into rugged manhood. i've just sorta been me my whole life, and over the years me has sort of adapted here and there, altered my tastes a bit, gotten a little bit wiser, a little bit more experienced every day. i think that's an interesting concept. that everyday we wake up we are at the cumulitive point of our existence. we literally get better everyday, you know? it's not like life is a book where our existence climaxes when we're 40 and then it's downhill from there. we just keep chugging along, so by the time i'm 40, i should be like TWICE the person i am today. then when i'm 80, i should be 4 times the person i am today. isn't that kind of cool? makes it more fun to wake up at least i think.
i guess the coolest thing of all about this weekend has been that i've been reminded continually of how blessed i am. i mean, this is true of everyday, but i think when you have a birthday you always tend to reflect just a little bit more. it's so amazing how much God has been working around me, and in me....revealing Himself in my life. i think regardless of all the presents in the world, and all the friends, and all the smiles, and my family - everything. regardless of all that, i think i've been thinking about how God never gave up on me. because i look back at the last year of my life, and i recognize that i'm a different person from who i was at this time last year. I'm so thankful that God is so patient, and so faithful, because everything that i have now - everything that i've ever had - is from His hand. and i dunno. i guess i'm just....i'm so thankful i'm in awe. there's no real words to describe how glad i am to have the peace of God's love...to have the promise of his grace. i think back to how my life was before....so full of doubt, so full of hate, so full of self-loathing and pride....and i shudder to think what I would be today if i had ignored God's whisper in my life. If i had dismissed that little voice in my head...in my heart.
hm...i seemed to have returned to the mushy stuff.
enh. i guess some things are inevitable. maybe i'm growing soft in my old age.
they're fun while they last, but the real joy is in the aftermath.
first off....i had such a great weekend. it was full of friends and fun. kind of a departure from my regular birthday routine of lazing around the house (which coincidentally is actually my favourite past-time). i'm totally blessed beyond anything i deserve, and thanks to all u guys that called or icq'd me, i really appreciate it. also, i just want to reitterate to the world that i have the best girlfriend EVAR. so SUCKS FOR YOU rest of the world. booyah.
now that all that mushy stuff is through, lets move on....
i guess the inevitable aspect about birthdays is that you realize you're a year older. or as i like to think - one year closer to dying. yeehaw! i guess in some respects it's a little sad. i'm officially into my twenties. then again, i think it's kind of cool that i'm into my twenties. i think when i was young, like....12.....i wasn't even capable of picturing myself as being a twenty-something. that reality seemed so ridiculous and distant that i never even bothered imagining what it would be like. sort of like how i could never imagine what it's going to be like when i'm 50 now. it's this frame of time that's so far away you don't even bother giving it any serious thought. but hey! look at this. i'm here. i'm 21.
i think the single most shocking thing in hindsight isn't that i'm old....but that it's all happened so fast. it's like that scene in monty python's search for the holy grail where lancelot? whatever. one of them knight people is running across a field, and two soldiers look through a telescope and see him waaaay in the distance running towards them to attack. then when they cut back to the soldiers, he's like, running right into the scene and kills them. that's sort of how i feel. the years keep flying by, and i guess it's not a matter of "oh crap, i'm old" but it's more like "what the hell? when did this happen...?".
is life any different now? well....no. is it ever? i think i'm surprised by how quick, yet at the same time, how gradually life has been moseying along. it seems like in the blink of an eye i'm 21. yet there hasn't been any real dramatic changes....no coming of age stories to tell.....no tales of reckless youth maturing into rugged manhood. i've just sorta been me my whole life, and over the years me has sort of adapted here and there, altered my tastes a bit, gotten a little bit wiser, a little bit more experienced every day. i think that's an interesting concept. that everyday we wake up we are at the cumulitive point of our existence. we literally get better everyday, you know? it's not like life is a book where our existence climaxes when we're 40 and then it's downhill from there. we just keep chugging along, so by the time i'm 40, i should be like TWICE the person i am today. then when i'm 80, i should be 4 times the person i am today. isn't that kind of cool? makes it more fun to wake up at least i think.
i guess the coolest thing of all about this weekend has been that i've been reminded continually of how blessed i am. i mean, this is true of everyday, but i think when you have a birthday you always tend to reflect just a little bit more. it's so amazing how much God has been working around me, and in me....revealing Himself in my life. i think regardless of all the presents in the world, and all the friends, and all the smiles, and my family - everything. regardless of all that, i think i've been thinking about how God never gave up on me. because i look back at the last year of my life, and i recognize that i'm a different person from who i was at this time last year. I'm so thankful that God is so patient, and so faithful, because everything that i have now - everything that i've ever had - is from His hand. and i dunno. i guess i'm just....i'm so thankful i'm in awe. there's no real words to describe how glad i am to have the peace of God's love...to have the promise of his grace. i think back to how my life was before....so full of doubt, so full of hate, so full of self-loathing and pride....and i shudder to think what I would be today if i had ignored God's whisper in my life. If i had dismissed that little voice in my head...in my heart.
hm...i seemed to have returned to the mushy stuff.
enh. i guess some things are inevitable. maybe i'm growing soft in my old age.
Nov 2, 2003
the new fad...
does no one else think this background picture is hillarious?
anyone??
fine fine....i'm a dork, i can admit it....
anyone??
fine fine....i'm a dork, i can admit it....
Oct 31, 2003
hmmm.....i've been neglecting you my legion of loyal fans, i apologize for not blogging lately as I either haven't had much to say, or haven't had time to say it, or frankly haven't felt like sharing it with the world.
i have some free time now since i'm waiting for 8am to roll around so i can go play basketball....i'm working my way through an entire 2litre bottle of coke [shameless plug] tonight, so i'm full of pep and ready to go.
where to begin....
it's the 31st now. happy halloween everybody. instead of scheming up ways to steal candy from children this year, i've spent the last little while surfing ebay for half amusement, half bargain hunting. i think i've decided to only buy clothes off ebay from now on and see how that goes. sure, everything will be either size XL or XXL, but hey - thats a small price to pay for getting an article as priceless and rare as a Josip Broz Tito shirt (everyone's favourite yugoslavian - outside of vlade divac, of course). or how about this dr. who shirt. it's EMO! i thought that was the funniest thing in the world. since when was being emo a sales point? what the hell does it even mean when a t-shirt is emo? oh well. buy this shirt and maybe you'll know when you put it on. perhaps you will be endowed with the powers of emo, and you can cry yourself to sleep every night in your tshirt and billions of pins while listening to dashboard and posting on the weezer message board about how lame these new albums are and how much you loved weezer way back when the sweater song first came out in grade school.....
ah yes, ebay. so much amusement from so modest a website.
actually, one positive thing does seem to have risen from all this pointless web surfing. i think i have the talent to make witty retorts that would fit on the front of a tshirt. perhaps i shall go ahead and make a tshirt or two in the near future if i have some free time. i have so many ideas it would be stupid for me not to make tshirts!
speaking of designing though, i really miss having photoshop. i think it's a sham that it costs like, $600 to purchase new. how the hell am i suppose to afford that? booruns. if someone can help me rationalize using the pirated version - please...please come convince me.
other random thoughts that have been floating around in my head lately...
do dreams really mean anything? sure, there's the whole theory that it's our subconcious revealing our inner truths.....is there anything to this whole dream interpretation thing? do most people honestly believe that dreams have meaning, and are significant in their symbolism? or is the general concensus that dreams are merely random thoughts thrown around in your head while your mind takes five.....
i think the most amazing thing i experienced this whole week was realizing that i'm living a daydream right now. i'm making memories.
it's so easy to be nostalgic....think back to the good old days of high school, junior high, grade school.....we have so many memories from our youth (relative youth at least...) that sometimes we take for granted that the years we're probably going to remember most.....the times that we very much will be most nostalgic, have the most vivid recollections about - are right now. we're never going to have this balance of freedom and youth again. ever. we're literally living one of the absolute best, most memorable and gratifying times of our lives right now. and it's at once an amazing realization, and an encouraging one.
sometimes i wake up at 3pm in the afternoon, do nothing, then go to bed.
i went to bed last night and i was like......man....i did NOTHING today. and on some levels, that's soooo cool. when am i ever gonna be able to get away with this again? hell, i'm pulling an all night just BECAUSE right now. to play stupid basketball in a few hours, haha
sure, at the same time i was like "i just totally wasted a day of my life. that's not cool...." but hey - you can't win 'em all.
sometimes i take for granted how great life is. how much God has blessed me and how much i have to be thankful for. sometimes this attitude leads me to not live my life to its fullest, and it's just kind of neat realizing that years from now, i'll be sitting around with old friends saying "remember back in university when....." and get the same feeling i now get when i say "remember back in high school when...."
i never had this kind of realization in high school. you're too young....to ignorant....to cocky to think that you might ever have to grow up. but now i have the experience and the wisdom to realize that i'm living a dream right now...everyday i wake up is a chance for a new memory to be made, for an experience to be imprinted into me that will last with me forever. sure, this applies through life, but i have to think moreso now than ever again. and it's cool....understanding your situation only makes it that much sweeter....
i have some free time now since i'm waiting for 8am to roll around so i can go play basketball....i'm working my way through an entire 2litre bottle of coke [shameless plug] tonight, so i'm full of pep and ready to go.
where to begin....
it's the 31st now. happy halloween everybody. instead of scheming up ways to steal candy from children this year, i've spent the last little while surfing ebay for half amusement, half bargain hunting. i think i've decided to only buy clothes off ebay from now on and see how that goes. sure, everything will be either size XL or XXL, but hey - thats a small price to pay for getting an article as priceless and rare as a Josip Broz Tito shirt (everyone's favourite yugoslavian - outside of vlade divac, of course). or how about this dr. who shirt. it's EMO! i thought that was the funniest thing in the world. since when was being emo a sales point? what the hell does it even mean when a t-shirt is emo? oh well. buy this shirt and maybe you'll know when you put it on. perhaps you will be endowed with the powers of emo, and you can cry yourself to sleep every night in your tshirt and billions of pins while listening to dashboard and posting on the weezer message board about how lame these new albums are and how much you loved weezer way back when the sweater song first came out in grade school.....
ah yes, ebay. so much amusement from so modest a website.
actually, one positive thing does seem to have risen from all this pointless web surfing. i think i have the talent to make witty retorts that would fit on the front of a tshirt. perhaps i shall go ahead and make a tshirt or two in the near future if i have some free time. i have so many ideas it would be stupid for me not to make tshirts!
speaking of designing though, i really miss having photoshop. i think it's a sham that it costs like, $600 to purchase new. how the hell am i suppose to afford that? booruns. if someone can help me rationalize using the pirated version - please...please come convince me.
other random thoughts that have been floating around in my head lately...
do dreams really mean anything? sure, there's the whole theory that it's our subconcious revealing our inner truths.....is there anything to this whole dream interpretation thing? do most people honestly believe that dreams have meaning, and are significant in their symbolism? or is the general concensus that dreams are merely random thoughts thrown around in your head while your mind takes five.....
i think the most amazing thing i experienced this whole week was realizing that i'm living a daydream right now. i'm making memories.
it's so easy to be nostalgic....think back to the good old days of high school, junior high, grade school.....we have so many memories from our youth (relative youth at least...) that sometimes we take for granted that the years we're probably going to remember most.....the times that we very much will be most nostalgic, have the most vivid recollections about - are right now. we're never going to have this balance of freedom and youth again. ever. we're literally living one of the absolute best, most memorable and gratifying times of our lives right now. and it's at once an amazing realization, and an encouraging one.
sometimes i wake up at 3pm in the afternoon, do nothing, then go to bed.
i went to bed last night and i was like......man....i did NOTHING today. and on some levels, that's soooo cool. when am i ever gonna be able to get away with this again? hell, i'm pulling an all night just BECAUSE right now. to play stupid basketball in a few hours, haha
sure, at the same time i was like "i just totally wasted a day of my life. that's not cool...." but hey - you can't win 'em all.
sometimes i take for granted how great life is. how much God has blessed me and how much i have to be thankful for. sometimes this attitude leads me to not live my life to its fullest, and it's just kind of neat realizing that years from now, i'll be sitting around with old friends saying "remember back in university when....." and get the same feeling i now get when i say "remember back in high school when...."
i never had this kind of realization in high school. you're too young....to ignorant....to cocky to think that you might ever have to grow up. but now i have the experience and the wisdom to realize that i'm living a dream right now...everyday i wake up is a chance for a new memory to be made, for an experience to be imprinted into me that will last with me forever. sure, this applies through life, but i have to think moreso now than ever again. and it's cool....understanding your situation only makes it that much sweeter....
Oct 29, 2003
haven't updated in a while......thought i'd throw this up here for amusements sake.
the end of the world
the end of the world
Oct 24, 2003
The Globe and Mail
Geomagnetic Storm
the bad: it will disrupt electrical grids and satellite communications.
the good: it may make the northern lights visible tonight as far south as illinois.
i've never seen the northern lights....it'd be cool if they were around tonight.
the bad: it will disrupt electrical grids and satellite communications.
the good: it may make the northern lights visible tonight as far south as illinois.
i've never seen the northern lights....it'd be cool if they were around tonight.
Oct 23, 2003
Elliott Smith, 1969-2003
Elliott Smith has committed suicide.
i.....am at a loss for words. his music was dark, haunting, intimate and revealing - yet at the same time beautiful and catchy, creative, original, intelligent and most of all shone of its creators artistic and musical talent. it was well written, a quality increasingly scarce in today's musical landscape, and every song - every album, alluded to the promise of future treasure from his talented mind, hands and heart.
his songs inspired me to learn, to improve, to play the guitar for all it was worth and to the best of my abilities. he was a huge influence on me musically.
he had a new album on the verge of coming out.
i regret not buying back any of his albums yet, they're just so damn hard to find. i used to have them all downloaded. even the obscure ep's and live stuff. i feel compelled to apologize.
the greatest tragedy is that he was desperate enough to take his own life. no one should ever have to feel that alone. ever.
the world has truly lost a great musician today.
Elliott Smith has committed suicide.
i.....am at a loss for words. his music was dark, haunting, intimate and revealing - yet at the same time beautiful and catchy, creative, original, intelligent and most of all shone of its creators artistic and musical talent. it was well written, a quality increasingly scarce in today's musical landscape, and every song - every album, alluded to the promise of future treasure from his talented mind, hands and heart.
his songs inspired me to learn, to improve, to play the guitar for all it was worth and to the best of my abilities. he was a huge influence on me musically.
he had a new album on the verge of coming out.
i regret not buying back any of his albums yet, they're just so damn hard to find. i used to have them all downloaded. even the obscure ep's and live stuff. i feel compelled to apologize.
the greatest tragedy is that he was desperate enough to take his own life. no one should ever have to feel that alone. ever.
the world has truly lost a great musician today.
Grosseries
Grosseries
i hope my pun is found to be witty.
today's rant will be about the whoring of public space.
they're turning maple leaf gardens into a loblaws. a supermarket. with like, a produce section, and a bakery, and probably one of those loblaws home areas where they sell lawn furniture and such.
i think only a person of supreme ignorance could feel the benefit of gaining a conveniently located supermarket outweighs the loss of a local, and even national shrine and treasure.
hockey is an undeniable part of canadian culture. even those who don't LIKE hockey must admit to it's association with our country - our identity. and to hockey, MLG is the mecca of it all. it's where memories where created, stars were born and the seeds of dreams and aspirations sown.
the leafs are a huge part of toronto's social and cultural fabric. to simply appropriate this legendary place for the a supermarket to have a novel and kitschy flagship GROCERY STORE for goodness sake.
i feel the city is in general pretty disgusted. i have to think the thought running through many torontonian heads this morning must be:
is nothing sacred?
on an unrelated note: i hope they find that little girl who was kidnapped.
how come it's such a big story though? kids are lost all the time. It's almost a sham how only the cute kids who come from upper-middle class homes are turned into news frenzies and unfortunately, media martyrs.
not to belittle her situation, but i think we simply need to take it into context. how many homeless 9 year olds has the city of toronto lost this past year? let die? let freeze? let get molested and abused? let live on the street? let starve?
regardless of the reality of the way our society functions and its obvious shortcomings, i really hope they find her though. no life is worth anymore than another.
i hope my pun is found to be witty.
today's rant will be about the whoring of public space.
they're turning maple leaf gardens into a loblaws. a supermarket. with like, a produce section, and a bakery, and probably one of those loblaws home areas where they sell lawn furniture and such.
i think only a person of supreme ignorance could feel the benefit of gaining a conveniently located supermarket outweighs the loss of a local, and even national shrine and treasure.
hockey is an undeniable part of canadian culture. even those who don't LIKE hockey must admit to it's association with our country - our identity. and to hockey, MLG is the mecca of it all. it's where memories where created, stars were born and the seeds of dreams and aspirations sown.
the leafs are a huge part of toronto's social and cultural fabric. to simply appropriate this legendary place for the a supermarket to have a novel and kitschy flagship GROCERY STORE for goodness sake.
i feel the city is in general pretty disgusted. i have to think the thought running through many torontonian heads this morning must be:
is nothing sacred?
on an unrelated note: i hope they find that little girl who was kidnapped.
how come it's such a big story though? kids are lost all the time. It's almost a sham how only the cute kids who come from upper-middle class homes are turned into news frenzies and unfortunately, media martyrs.
not to belittle her situation, but i think we simply need to take it into context. how many homeless 9 year olds has the city of toronto lost this past year? let die? let freeze? let get molested and abused? let live on the street? let starve?
regardless of the reality of the way our society functions and its obvious shortcomings, i really hope they find her though. no life is worth anymore than another.
Oct 21, 2003
boourns
my comments server killed my account because i didn't upgrade to a paying account.
boourns to squawkbox and their pee pee soaked heck hole of a website.
oh well. now i have "shout outs" instead of comments.
what the hell's a shoutout anyways?
enh. according to trey from south park, gay is the new black. and wigger's are out man.
it's wags now.
hehheh...wags...
boourns to squawkbox and their pee pee soaked heck hole of a website.
oh well. now i have "shout outs" instead of comments.
what the hell's a shoutout anyways?
enh. according to trey from south park, gay is the new black. and wigger's are out man.
it's wags now.
hehheh...wags...
Oct 16, 2003
idiots
"the monastic theory that not asceticism but the sexual act denotes the renunciation of attainable bliss receives negative confirmation in the gravity of the lover who with foreboding commits his life to the fleeting moment"
i hate academics.
why do they have to write like this? i mean, buddy. isn't that a run on sentence or something? at least include some punctuation, because if you did i could MAYBE pretend i knew what you're trying to say there. but as it is....um.......what?
i hate academics.
why do they have to write like this? i mean, buddy. isn't that a run on sentence or something? at least include some punctuation, because if you did i could MAYBE pretend i knew what you're trying to say there. but as it is....um.......what?
Oct 15, 2003
i find myself having a little bit of pride in my posts. If i go an entire week with nothing but links and updates in my daily routine, i almost feel obliged to post something of merit to get the masses thinking and reward them for visiting my lowly and humble home in cyberspace.
what does it mean to be happy?
clearly being happy is not the same as being content. if it was, they would be synonyms of some sort. but they aren't. they're different words, with diferent definitions, and very diferent understandings.
so how many of us are truly happy?
in my experiences, i find it to be a general concensus that as you grow older, life will take its toll. as years fly by and memories grow distant, we all end up being a little more cynical, a little more jaded. kids are idealistic, romantic. we find kids who like to dream adorable - they're pure, untainted by reality and that's why they're so attractive to us. because as older folk, we know that they're living the impossible in their tiny little heads. after all - a hopelessly romantic idealistic chap would be considered naive as a 20 year old, laughed at and labeled foolish and immature by his peers. those qualities in a child though, are regarded as delightful reminders to better times - the beauty of being young. following that train of thought then, i've found that many an individual i have come upon, has decided that (appropriately) they are willing to settle for contentment. nay, they are not merely content with being content, but they seekit. happiness, they reason, is out of the question. a notion so laughable that they dare not say its name. so why bother? take what's more likely, take what you think is more achievable - take what you've got.
i suppose the logistics of it aren't totally non-sensical. i mean, that happiness 100% of the time is painfully optimistic and a difficult burden to bear is not lost on me. the problem i have with this type of thinking is that we seem to be fixated on the concept of happiness as an objective thing.
i want "A", but i can't have it. so i get "B". i'm not as happy with "B" than i would be with "A", but i'll take it since i can't have "A", and i'll be content with "B", all the while thinking how much happier i'd be if i had gotten "A".
why why WHY do we all seem to have that mindset? "i'm pretty happy....BUT, i could be MORE happy IF...."
maybe what we all need to do as a society is to start seeing happiness as a subjective concept. i mean think about it a sec - if we all stopped looking at the other pasture and thinking it's greener on the other side, if we all just stopped looking for happiness on top of what we're already happy about, then maybe we wouldn't be so darn hard to please.....we seem to have insatiable appetites for happiness. we never have enough. i suppose that begs the question "is being content with how happy you are really being happy? or being content?" and to that i would say....that's being content. because i think that mindset is still what i mentioned originally. i would think we'd all be more chipper in the morning when we woke up, if we instead thought to ourselves "i'm happy". not that we're happy ENOUGH, but just that..... we're happy. simple.
but why is it so darn hard? why are we constantly second guessing ourselves? trying to reach that one bar higher on our self-satisfaction ladders? why are we so.....greedy? it's something i've always wondered in my own life. i believe deep down i truly have found joy in my faith, in the peace of mind that God loves me. i think happiness in many senses of the word is fleeting. that's why i think so many people are wandering around in life aimless searching for it. because it can never be held captive, there's nothing anyone can do to keep themselves happy all the time.
happiness won't keep you going in life, because it will leave you. but joy - joy will always be there. if i've learned anything recently, it's that being joyful and being happy are two different things, and it's been encouraging in that even when there are things in my life that make me decidedly unhappy, i have joy to cling to. i know that regardless of what happens in my life, i'll still be joyful, and that in turn sort of makes me happy. i believe that we should be happy so we can live our lives, and not living our lives so we can be happy.
on that note, i've decided to define what we seek (plato's ideal if you will) as"true happiness" as joy, and real life happiness as just....an emotion. a moment, a smile, a laugh. but regardless, happiness is temporal, not something i dare to seek. because it's pointless! life hasn't jaded me (ok, it has. but not that much), but experience has shown me the truth. even kids can't be happy all the time....it's not that it's wrong to be romantic and idealistic, but ironically it's ultimately much more happy (emotionally) to be joyful, than it is to either be content and full of resentment and regret, or to be crushed seeking the thrill of happiness in all your lifes endeavers.
so yup. go seek joy, this whole happiness thing is so passe.
it'll put a smile on your face.
what does it mean to be happy?
clearly being happy is not the same as being content. if it was, they would be synonyms of some sort. but they aren't. they're different words, with diferent definitions, and very diferent understandings.
so how many of us are truly happy?
in my experiences, i find it to be a general concensus that as you grow older, life will take its toll. as years fly by and memories grow distant, we all end up being a little more cynical, a little more jaded. kids are idealistic, romantic. we find kids who like to dream adorable - they're pure, untainted by reality and that's why they're so attractive to us. because as older folk, we know that they're living the impossible in their tiny little heads. after all - a hopelessly romantic idealistic chap would be considered naive as a 20 year old, laughed at and labeled foolish and immature by his peers. those qualities in a child though, are regarded as delightful reminders to better times - the beauty of being young. following that train of thought then, i've found that many an individual i have come upon, has decided that (appropriately) they are willing to settle for contentment. nay, they are not merely content with being content, but they seekit. happiness, they reason, is out of the question. a notion so laughable that they dare not say its name. so why bother? take what's more likely, take what you think is more achievable - take what you've got.
i suppose the logistics of it aren't totally non-sensical. i mean, that happiness 100% of the time is painfully optimistic and a difficult burden to bear is not lost on me. the problem i have with this type of thinking is that we seem to be fixated on the concept of happiness as an objective thing.
i want "A", but i can't have it. so i get "B". i'm not as happy with "B" than i would be with "A", but i'll take it since i can't have "A", and i'll be content with "B", all the while thinking how much happier i'd be if i had gotten "A".
why why WHY do we all seem to have that mindset? "i'm pretty happy....BUT, i could be MORE happy IF...."
maybe what we all need to do as a society is to start seeing happiness as a subjective concept. i mean think about it a sec - if we all stopped looking at the other pasture and thinking it's greener on the other side, if we all just stopped looking for happiness on top of what we're already happy about, then maybe we wouldn't be so darn hard to please.....we seem to have insatiable appetites for happiness. we never have enough. i suppose that begs the question "is being content with how happy you are really being happy? or being content?" and to that i would say....that's being content. because i think that mindset is still what i mentioned originally. i would think we'd all be more chipper in the morning when we woke up, if we instead thought to ourselves "i'm happy". not that we're happy ENOUGH, but just that..... we're happy. simple.
but why is it so darn hard? why are we constantly second guessing ourselves? trying to reach that one bar higher on our self-satisfaction ladders? why are we so.....greedy? it's something i've always wondered in my own life. i believe deep down i truly have found joy in my faith, in the peace of mind that God loves me. i think happiness in many senses of the word is fleeting. that's why i think so many people are wandering around in life aimless searching for it. because it can never be held captive, there's nothing anyone can do to keep themselves happy all the time.
happiness won't keep you going in life, because it will leave you. but joy - joy will always be there. if i've learned anything recently, it's that being joyful and being happy are two different things, and it's been encouraging in that even when there are things in my life that make me decidedly unhappy, i have joy to cling to. i know that regardless of what happens in my life, i'll still be joyful, and that in turn sort of makes me happy. i believe that we should be happy so we can live our lives, and not living our lives so we can be happy.
on that note, i've decided to define what we seek (plato's ideal if you will) as"true happiness" as joy, and real life happiness as just....an emotion. a moment, a smile, a laugh. but regardless, happiness is temporal, not something i dare to seek. because it's pointless! life hasn't jaded me (ok, it has. but not that much), but experience has shown me the truth. even kids can't be happy all the time....it's not that it's wrong to be romantic and idealistic, but ironically it's ultimately much more happy (emotionally) to be joyful, than it is to either be content and full of resentment and regret, or to be crushed seeking the thrill of happiness in all your lifes endeavers.
so yup. go seek joy, this whole happiness thing is so passe.
it'll put a smile on your face.
Oct 13, 2003
for some reason i find i'm averse to using caps. i like the aesthetic appearance of all lower case letters. something about caps just seems so....cold. so sterile.
so i think everyone at some time or another has read a poem and thought to themselves, "huh? i could write that. it makes no sense"
and yet, those simple words we could have written (but didn't) are considered poetry, yet the crap most of us vandalize our notebooks with in lectures is considered doodling. i'd like to study poetry in-depth i think.....get a better understanding of it. i mean, do poets labour of each word as they write to infuse the poem with the maximum amount of meaning? or do they just write what's on their hearts, then critics infuse the words with meaning FOR them?
are the words based on emotion? the abstract art of creation and the state of mind that understands one is making art? or more a precise calculation - an exercise in vocabulary and stylistic paradigms?
i'm fascinated.
i'll try and randomly write a poem. see if anyone can analyze it and explain what it means....what i'm trying to say, all that stuff.
Memorandum
it burns ever brighter
attracting eyes, through the dust
reconciling, giving life to the dead
water on a moonlit flower petal
new life's first exaltation of existence
the insignificance is lost for a moment
radiance is subjective
there are no constants
fan the hot, heat the cold
no reason to be found
yet time stops - stopped
if only it were true
so i think everyone at some time or another has read a poem and thought to themselves, "huh? i could write that. it makes no sense"
and yet, those simple words we could have written (but didn't) are considered poetry, yet the crap most of us vandalize our notebooks with in lectures is considered doodling. i'd like to study poetry in-depth i think.....get a better understanding of it. i mean, do poets labour of each word as they write to infuse the poem with the maximum amount of meaning? or do they just write what's on their hearts, then critics infuse the words with meaning FOR them?
are the words based on emotion? the abstract art of creation and the state of mind that understands one is making art? or more a precise calculation - an exercise in vocabulary and stylistic paradigms?
i'm fascinated.
i'll try and randomly write a poem. see if anyone can analyze it and explain what it means....what i'm trying to say, all that stuff.
Memorandum
it burns ever brighter
attracting eyes, through the dust
reconciling, giving life to the dead
water on a moonlit flower petal
new life's first exaltation of existence
the insignificance is lost for a moment
radiance is subjective
there are no constants
fan the hot, heat the cold
no reason to be found
yet time stops - stopped
if only it were true
Oct 11, 2003
we welcome Cammie to the culture of the blogged.
may your days be full of ranting and satisfying procrastination.
may your days be full of ranting and satisfying procrastination.
blog!
thats a funny word to say if you actually yell it outloud. so i was bored and decided to surf around the national geographic website. it's really cool. tons of awesome picture galleries. thats where i snatched this background from.
also, for those who use the links on the right, i've added an option to open links in new windows so you can close them
also i ripped joel's christopher oriley cd. he's a pianist who covers 15 radiohead tracks, all using nothing but a grand piano. no vocals, no other instruments, just the piano.
it's an AMAZING cd. really a must get for radiohead fans, and people who generally like awesome music on piano. i was particularly impressed by his stellar rendition of 'black star', but far and away what blew me away was his cover of 'bulletproof'. I mean, that song is pretty cool in and of itself, but man. this guy takes it and really makes it his own. it makes you want to cry its so good.
simply INCREDIBLE. i recommend you get this cd now.
go.
hurry, get it. stop dawdling.
thats a funny word to say if you actually yell it outloud. so i was bored and decided to surf around the national geographic website. it's really cool. tons of awesome picture galleries. thats where i snatched this background from.
also, for those who use the links on the right, i've added an option to open links in new windows so you can close them
also i ripped joel's christopher oriley cd. he's a pianist who covers 15 radiohead tracks, all using nothing but a grand piano. no vocals, no other instruments, just the piano.
it's an AMAZING cd. really a must get for radiohead fans, and people who generally like awesome music on piano. i was particularly impressed by his stellar rendition of 'black star', but far and away what blew me away was his cover of 'bulletproof'. I mean, that song is pretty cool in and of itself, but man. this guy takes it and really makes it his own. it makes you want to cry its so good.
simply INCREDIBLE. i recommend you get this cd now.
go.
hurry, get it. stop dawdling.
Oct 9, 2003
there are some things we take for granted that when you pause to consider are just.....totally astounding.
take for instance airplanes. especially the giant army ones. that those things were engineered, and built, and that they WORK, it's nuts. they're little buildings just flying through the air, built of nothing but sheets of metal, screws, bolts and computers.
amazing.
i remember i was suppose to do a gifted ISP on airplanes in like grade 6 or something, but then i didn't do it, and i got yelled at, so then i did it like a week late, and even then all i did was read out of a book i borrowed from the library. my teacher was none too impressed. but i didn't fail. because you couldn't fail gifted. which was something i still don't understand. i suppose if they failed you, it would sort of be the school board admitting they had screwed up by letting you into the program in the first place.....
whudaya know, i'm a product of bureaucratic pride. interesting.
anyways, i wonder if it's better to sleep for like, 1 hour, or if it's better for you to just stay awake. is sleeping then prematurely waking up bad for you? sort of like starting and shutting of a car engine repeatedly? hm....right now i typically go by the no-sleep method, and i think it's starting to catch up to me as i have a long day ahead of me and i'm desperately trying to think of a time to squeeze in a nap.
on a totally unrelated note, i must say i'm relatively pleased with the school year so far. i think the key is i have no morning classes, and i live really close in a big cushy apartment. mmmm.....the lap of luxury......
take for instance airplanes. especially the giant army ones. that those things were engineered, and built, and that they WORK, it's nuts. they're little buildings just flying through the air, built of nothing but sheets of metal, screws, bolts and computers.
amazing.
i remember i was suppose to do a gifted ISP on airplanes in like grade 6 or something, but then i didn't do it, and i got yelled at, so then i did it like a week late, and even then all i did was read out of a book i borrowed from the library. my teacher was none too impressed. but i didn't fail. because you couldn't fail gifted. which was something i still don't understand. i suppose if they failed you, it would sort of be the school board admitting they had screwed up by letting you into the program in the first place.....
whudaya know, i'm a product of bureaucratic pride. interesting.
anyways, i wonder if it's better to sleep for like, 1 hour, or if it's better for you to just stay awake. is sleeping then prematurely waking up bad for you? sort of like starting and shutting of a car engine repeatedly? hm....right now i typically go by the no-sleep method, and i think it's starting to catch up to me as i have a long day ahead of me and i'm desperately trying to think of a time to squeeze in a nap.
on a totally unrelated note, i must say i'm relatively pleased with the school year so far. i think the key is i have no morning classes, and i live really close in a big cushy apartment. mmmm.....the lap of luxury......
Oct 8, 2003
an old camping picture. i'm running out of pictures.....i really think i'm not making efficient use of my camera. which is kind of shame. it just feels so stupid sometimes to bring a camera along when you know that of the 10 people you're going with 7 other will have digicam's and will be taking pictures every 4 steps you take. then everyone has the exact same pictures posted on various websites around the internet.
i think i have an obsession with being unique. kind of ironic - me being chinese and all....it's hard to be unique when you know at any given time there's about 300,000 people walking the earth with your exact name and another 100,000 that probably look exactly like you...but i really think that when something becomes popular, or overdone, or too mainstream, it really really puts me off. if everyone's doing something, i prefer not to do it just for the sake of not doing what everyone else is doing. sweet, i'm a snob!
conversely, i hate to consider myself part of the counter-culture, trend dissemenating generation that prides itself on being "indie". i don't pride myself on being unique. i just don't like being maintstream. does that make any sense? as in, i have nothing AGAINST what's popular, i just don't like it as much as stuff that isn't popular. not to say i don't like popular things.
i went to a backstreet boys concert once. it was amusing.
anyways, i added steph's page to the links on the right (per wendy's request). hopefully she'll keep updating often, it's providing me with precious many moments of amusement thusfar.
also, cammie seems to think my posts are getting boring. apparently my pages sole purpose is to amuse her, so i'll just make up something exciting that happened. then i'll make it contraversial.
i killed a man.
then he came back from the dead, and he came up to me and he was all like "hey - your socks don't match" so i said, "yea, that's a good point, but what would marx say about it?" and he said "i don't know. but never let anyone touch you in your bathing suit areas" and then i said "yea, unless it's some sort of exhibitionist art project, then it can't be classified as porn really because it's art" then the guy said "i don't believe public funding should be used for those sketchy art projects" then i said "as long as my laundry still gets done before 8, because i want to watch game 1 of the new york - boston ALCS" and the dead guy was totally like "did you know arnold is the new gov. of California?" and i said in shock "as long as you list all your emergency contacts in case anything happens".
discuss.
i think i have an obsession with being unique. kind of ironic - me being chinese and all....it's hard to be unique when you know at any given time there's about 300,000 people walking the earth with your exact name and another 100,000 that probably look exactly like you...but i really think that when something becomes popular, or overdone, or too mainstream, it really really puts me off. if everyone's doing something, i prefer not to do it just for the sake of not doing what everyone else is doing. sweet, i'm a snob!
conversely, i hate to consider myself part of the counter-culture, trend dissemenating generation that prides itself on being "indie". i don't pride myself on being unique. i just don't like being maintstream. does that make any sense? as in, i have nothing AGAINST what's popular, i just don't like it as much as stuff that isn't popular. not to say i don't like popular things.
i went to a backstreet boys concert once. it was amusing.
anyways, i added steph's page to the links on the right (per wendy's request). hopefully she'll keep updating often, it's providing me with precious many moments of amusement thusfar.
also, cammie seems to think my posts are getting boring. apparently my pages sole purpose is to amuse her, so i'll just make up something exciting that happened. then i'll make it contraversial.
i killed a man.
then he came back from the dead, and he came up to me and he was all like "hey - your socks don't match" so i said, "yea, that's a good point, but what would marx say about it?" and he said "i don't know. but never let anyone touch you in your bathing suit areas" and then i said "yea, unless it's some sort of exhibitionist art project, then it can't be classified as porn really because it's art" then the guy said "i don't believe public funding should be used for those sketchy art projects" then i said "as long as my laundry still gets done before 8, because i want to watch game 1 of the new york - boston ALCS" and the dead guy was totally like "did you know arnold is the new gov. of California?" and i said in shock "as long as you list all your emergency contacts in case anything happens".
discuss.
Oct 6, 2003
for some reason when i transfer files through my network/router, drag and click goes at about 30kbps. however....if i use ICQ instead, i for some mysterious reason can hit speeds of up to almost 2MEGS per second. me and herb were so amused by this ridiculous transfer speed i took a picture. we're such nerds.....but honestly, it's kind of neat being able to send 100 megs in less than 2 minutes.
on an unrelated note, blogger has given us lowly folk new features like spellcheck, draft blogging and other functions only available to bloggerpro users. what can i say? mmmm.....free stuff......
on an unrelated note, blogger has given us lowly folk new features like spellcheck, draft blogging and other functions only available to bloggerpro users. what can i say? mmmm.....free stuff......
Oct 4, 2003
if anyone is curious about what to get me for Christmas, i'm going to go ahead and show you what i think would be awesome.
www.ghettopoly.com/
my favourite touch is how the "bank" is called the "loan shark tray".
it's the little details that show they're dedicated.
i'm laughing so hard i think i pulled something.....
www.ghettopoly.com/
my favourite touch is how the "bank" is called the "loan shark tray".
it's the little details that show they're dedicated.
i'm laughing so hard i think i pulled something.....
Oct 2, 2003
today is the first of october.
what does that mean? it marks the first day of Universal Music's 30% price slash in CD prices.
i'm unbelievably excited about this price cut. it'll give me a chance to more rapidly buy back a lot of the albums i've missed but haven't been able to buy due to financial restraints.
mmm....cds....
what does that mean? it marks the first day of Universal Music's 30% price slash in CD prices.
i'm unbelievably excited about this price cut. it'll give me a chance to more rapidly buy back a lot of the albums i've missed but haven't been able to buy due to financial restraints.
mmm....cds....
Sep 25, 2003
so as i was about to fall asleep yesterday, i (as i habitually do nowadays) reached for my devos and prayed.
little did i expect to have my prayers answered to bluntly.
i think every time i do devos i pray the same thing generally. that God would speak to me through His word, and through my devo materials (my utmost for his highest) and that i would listen. simple enough, but over the last few weeks i've found this process increasingly difficult. I wasn't sure what it was, but i felt disjointed in my walk. I felt as though i couldn't quite hear what God wanted from me.
I knew that it was a matter of my heart, but i couldn't figure out what it was. all i wanted was to know my Lord more, and for some reason i couldn't. I'd been totally stunted in the last few weeks, i'd stopped growing it felt like, stopped being challenged. I wasn't angry....or sad, or anything, but i knew i was complacent. and i couldn't figure out why i couldn't kick my own apathy.
so i opened up devos last night.....and this is what i read.
*****************************************************************
September 24
The "Go" of Preparation
If you bring your gift to the altar, and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar, and go your way. First be reconciled to your brother, and then come and offer your gift
—Matthew 5:23-24
It is easy for us to imagine that we will suddenly come to a point in our lives where we are fully prepared, but preparation is not suddenly accomplished. In fact, it is a process that must be steadily maintained. It is dangerous to become settled and complacent in our present level of experience. The Christian life requires preparation and more preparation.
The sense of sacrifice in the Christian life is readily appealing to a new Christian. From a human standpoint, the one thing that attracts us to Jesus Christ is our sense of the heroic, and a close examination of us by our Lord’s words suddenly puts this tide of enthusiasm to the test. ". . . go your way. First be reconciled to your brother. . . ." The "go" of preparation is to allow the Word of God to examine you closely. Your sense of heroic sacrifice is not good enough. The thing the Holy Spirit will detect in you is your nature that can never work in His service. And no one but God can detect that nature in you. Do you have anything to hide from God? If you do, then let God search you with His light. If there is sin in your life, don’t just admit it—confess it. Are you willing to obey your Lord and Master, whatever the humiliation to your right to yourself may be?
Never disregard a conviction that the Holy Spirit brings to you. If it is important enough for the Spirit of God to bring it to your mind, it is the very thing He is detecting in you. You were looking for some big thing to give up, while God is telling you of some tiny thing that must go. But behind that tiny thing lies the stronghold of obstinacy, and you say, "I will not give up my right to myself"—the very thing that God intends you to give up if you are to be a disciple of Jesus Christ.
*******************************************************************
I think every once in a while.....when God's nudging, and whispering, and hinting to you, it gets really easy to ignore it. You think - "well.....i'm moseying along in my walk, surely these little things are no big deal...." but praise God! every so often He'll beat you over the head until you stop dawdling and pay attention to Him.
i know that i've been.....unfocused. with my life, with my spiritual walk, with so much thats going on around me. and the one thought that has been really running through my mind that i've paid no heed to recently is the thought from 'Mere Christianity" where Lewis writes that God doesn't want part of us. He wants all of us. He's not here to make us better, He's here to make us perfect, and if we're committing ourselves to Him, then there's not stopping God from completing his work in us.
Only I can prevent God from working in me. to use a cliche, i suppose that is our gift, and that is our curse. He loved us enough to trust us, so that this responsibility would mean something. It means if we're up to it, we have to Love Him. and that means we have to let Him work. not partially. not to the point where we're content with our own sense of self-satisfaction, but totally. absolutely.
it's encouraging. but it's at the same time unnerving, and that bothers me. why do i doubt?? When Peter walked on water, it was by the Grace of Jesus that he was able to perform this miracle. Yet ....
...when he noticed the strong wind, he became frightened, and beginning to sink, he cried out, "Lord, save me!"
Jesus immediately reached out his hand and caught him, saying to him, "You of little faith, why did you doubt?"
When they got into the boat, the wind ceased.
Matthew 14:30-32
I have issues with trusting God. ultimately, that's been the problem all along. I worry where I'm going to get money from....I worry that i'm not disciplined enough to do well in school, i worry that i'm not maintaining my relationship well enough, etc. etc....i worry about how little i can do, and yet still i refuse to adhere to God's will because i don't have the faith to put things into His hands and give them up out of my own control. I'm scared. but thank you God for being my comforter. For being faithful, and calming the storms, so that when the next storm comes, i may have peace in my heart by keeping my eyes on You.
It's just so cool that.....through confusion, God can suddenly cut through it all.....right to my heart. That even when i'm not willing to admit what i need, God knows. God knows me better than i know myself, and that's so amazing, because it means He will provide for me what i need better than i can, and better than i expect or think.
Praise the Lord!
little did i expect to have my prayers answered to bluntly.
i think every time i do devos i pray the same thing generally. that God would speak to me through His word, and through my devo materials (my utmost for his highest) and that i would listen. simple enough, but over the last few weeks i've found this process increasingly difficult. I wasn't sure what it was, but i felt disjointed in my walk. I felt as though i couldn't quite hear what God wanted from me.
I knew that it was a matter of my heart, but i couldn't figure out what it was. all i wanted was to know my Lord more, and for some reason i couldn't. I'd been totally stunted in the last few weeks, i'd stopped growing it felt like, stopped being challenged. I wasn't angry....or sad, or anything, but i knew i was complacent. and i couldn't figure out why i couldn't kick my own apathy.
so i opened up devos last night.....and this is what i read.
*****************************************************************
September 24
The "Go" of Preparation
If you bring your gift to the altar, and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar, and go your way. First be reconciled to your brother, and then come and offer your gift
—Matthew 5:23-24
It is easy for us to imagine that we will suddenly come to a point in our lives where we are fully prepared, but preparation is not suddenly accomplished. In fact, it is a process that must be steadily maintained. It is dangerous to become settled and complacent in our present level of experience. The Christian life requires preparation and more preparation.
The sense of sacrifice in the Christian life is readily appealing to a new Christian. From a human standpoint, the one thing that attracts us to Jesus Christ is our sense of the heroic, and a close examination of us by our Lord’s words suddenly puts this tide of enthusiasm to the test. ". . . go your way. First be reconciled to your brother. . . ." The "go" of preparation is to allow the Word of God to examine you closely. Your sense of heroic sacrifice is not good enough. The thing the Holy Spirit will detect in you is your nature that can never work in His service. And no one but God can detect that nature in you. Do you have anything to hide from God? If you do, then let God search you with His light. If there is sin in your life, don’t just admit it—confess it. Are you willing to obey your Lord and Master, whatever the humiliation to your right to yourself may be?
Never disregard a conviction that the Holy Spirit brings to you. If it is important enough for the Spirit of God to bring it to your mind, it is the very thing He is detecting in you. You were looking for some big thing to give up, while God is telling you of some tiny thing that must go. But behind that tiny thing lies the stronghold of obstinacy, and you say, "I will not give up my right to myself"—the very thing that God intends you to give up if you are to be a disciple of Jesus Christ.
*******************************************************************
I think every once in a while.....when God's nudging, and whispering, and hinting to you, it gets really easy to ignore it. You think - "well.....i'm moseying along in my walk, surely these little things are no big deal...." but praise God! every so often He'll beat you over the head until you stop dawdling and pay attention to Him.
i know that i've been.....unfocused. with my life, with my spiritual walk, with so much thats going on around me. and the one thought that has been really running through my mind that i've paid no heed to recently is the thought from 'Mere Christianity" where Lewis writes that God doesn't want part of us. He wants all of us. He's not here to make us better, He's here to make us perfect, and if we're committing ourselves to Him, then there's not stopping God from completing his work in us.
Only I can prevent God from working in me. to use a cliche, i suppose that is our gift, and that is our curse. He loved us enough to trust us, so that this responsibility would mean something. It means if we're up to it, we have to Love Him. and that means we have to let Him work. not partially. not to the point where we're content with our own sense of self-satisfaction, but totally. absolutely.
it's encouraging. but it's at the same time unnerving, and that bothers me. why do i doubt?? When Peter walked on water, it was by the Grace of Jesus that he was able to perform this miracle. Yet ....
...when he noticed the strong wind, he became frightened, and beginning to sink, he cried out, "Lord, save me!"
Jesus immediately reached out his hand and caught him, saying to him, "You of little faith, why did you doubt?"
When they got into the boat, the wind ceased.
Matthew 14:30-32
I have issues with trusting God. ultimately, that's been the problem all along. I worry where I'm going to get money from....I worry that i'm not disciplined enough to do well in school, i worry that i'm not maintaining my relationship well enough, etc. etc....i worry about how little i can do, and yet still i refuse to adhere to God's will because i don't have the faith to put things into His hands and give them up out of my own control. I'm scared. but thank you God for being my comforter. For being faithful, and calming the storms, so that when the next storm comes, i may have peace in my heart by keeping my eyes on You.
It's just so cool that.....through confusion, God can suddenly cut through it all.....right to my heart. That even when i'm not willing to admit what i need, God knows. God knows me better than i know myself, and that's so amazing, because it means He will provide for me what i need better than i can, and better than i expect or think.
Praise the Lord!
Sep 23, 2003
merchants of cool:
this documentary really made me think about the process and system of our culture, and about the significance and meaning of the word "cool" in society as i know it. what is cool?
how much of what we consider cool is due to the bombardment on consumers from media conglomerates, and how much is actually my personal taste? it reminds me of josie and the pussycats a little bit.
do i really like that shirt? or do i only like it because i've been "educated" to like it? how can one possibly be unique, individual, when what's unique and individual is rapidly being co-opted and spit out by the marketing machine?
what does it mean to be avant-garde? is it possible to truely be avant-garde and still be a functional member of society? can you live a high quality of life and still stand against the established media and marketers?
i find it strange that as a faculty, MIT strives to be counter intuitive. to go against the grain for the sake of be non-conformist. but the second you're doing something FOR THE SAKE of being non-conformist, aren't you really just conforming? odd. odd indeed.
this documentary really made me think about the process and system of our culture, and about the significance and meaning of the word "cool" in society as i know it. what is cool?
how much of what we consider cool is due to the bombardment on consumers from media conglomerates, and how much is actually my personal taste? it reminds me of josie and the pussycats a little bit.
do i really like that shirt? or do i only like it because i've been "educated" to like it? how can one possibly be unique, individual, when what's unique and individual is rapidly being co-opted and spit out by the marketing machine?
what does it mean to be avant-garde? is it possible to truely be avant-garde and still be a functional member of society? can you live a high quality of life and still stand against the established media and marketers?
i find it strange that as a faculty, MIT strives to be counter intuitive. to go against the grain for the sake of be non-conformist. but the second you're doing something FOR THE SAKE of being non-conformist, aren't you really just conforming? odd. odd indeed.
Sep 19, 2003
Watch this 53 minute special from PBS: Merchants Of Cool
it's both thought provoking and enlightening, yet strangely disgusting in the way that you're disgusted when someone describes to you the biological aspect of being thrown into space without a spacesuit.
it's both thought provoking and enlightening, yet strangely disgusting in the way that you're disgusted when someone describes to you the biological aspect of being thrown into space without a spacesuit.
Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it
>
> >deosn't mttaer in
> >waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny
>iprmoetnt
> >tihng is taht
> >the frist and lsat ltteer be at the rghit pclae.
> >
> >The rset can be a total mses and you can sitll raed
>it
> >wouthit porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos
>not raed
> >ervey lteter by
> >istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe.
i've gotten this forward at least 4 times. does no one take into context that this only works because we understand the context in which words are used? if those jumbled sentences made no sense, we'd never be able to read them.
i.e
hpaenps wrduenofl, stkciy fiurt tweor
it doesn't seem so....i dunno.....crazy and amazing when you realize how much more difficult it is to read what i just wrote plus i mixed up the letters into a more difficult to read order.....interesting that the email forward mixes the letters into not very challenging "messes".
oh well. we are an easily amused people indeed.
p.s.
i wrote 'happens wonderful, sticky fruit tower"\'
>
> >deosn't mttaer in
> >waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny
>iprmoetnt
> >tihng is taht
> >the frist and lsat ltteer be at the rghit pclae.
> >
> >The rset can be a total mses and you can sitll raed
>it
> >wouthit porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos
>not raed
> >ervey lteter by
> >istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe.
i've gotten this forward at least 4 times. does no one take into context that this only works because we understand the context in which words are used? if those jumbled sentences made no sense, we'd never be able to read them.
i.e
hpaenps wrduenofl, stkciy fiurt tweor
it doesn't seem so....i dunno.....crazy and amazing when you realize how much more difficult it is to read what i just wrote plus i mixed up the letters into a more difficult to read order.....interesting that the email forward mixes the letters into not very challenging "messes".
oh well. we are an easily amused people indeed.
p.s.
i wrote 'happens wonderful, sticky fruit tower"\'
Sep 18, 2003
****click here****
what she's saying it seems is that hip-hop has been
co-opted by mainstream (read: non-black) culture and the
symbolism behind hip-hop needs to go back to its roots
as the legacy of Africa and its people. I guess
essentially what i'm arguing is that the absorbtion of
hip-hop into mainstream culture according to this author
is the high-jacking of Black culture by non-blacks.
there is merit to this, but not to point where there is
literally some sort of scheme to brainwash black youths.
Has it ever occured to her that the "co-opting of hip-hop"
has been embraced by black culture too? she herself
disagreed with Source magazine, an influential voice in
the African-American community. Is she more black than the
editors at Source mag? is she more black than Jay-Z?
what the hell does it even MEAN to be "more black"??
opinions can differ. her be-all-end-all argument that
hip-hop is inherently African seems to run into a wall
when the flag bearers of hip-hop culture say that isn't
necessarily the case.
those "flag bearers" aren't real hip-hop you say? they're sellouts you say?
frauds? confused? sacrificed to the machinations of capitalism?
well, i guess i wouldn't know. i'm asian. i'm not black enough to discern
what's real and what isn't. I'll be out back figuringout ways to
reinvent the sound of picking rice so i dont offend the author and
impede her on her quest for freedom and black power.....
.....BY ALIENATING OTHER BLACKS
[this is the kind of crap i have to talk about in school. i guess it could be worse]
what she's saying it seems is that hip-hop has been
co-opted by mainstream (read: non-black) culture and the
symbolism behind hip-hop needs to go back to its roots
as the legacy of Africa and its people. I guess
essentially what i'm arguing is that the absorbtion of
hip-hop into mainstream culture according to this author
is the high-jacking of Black culture by non-blacks.
there is merit to this, but not to point where there is
literally some sort of scheme to brainwash black youths.
Has it ever occured to her that the "co-opting of hip-hop"
has been embraced by black culture too? she herself
disagreed with Source magazine, an influential voice in
the African-American community. Is she more black than the
editors at Source mag? is she more black than Jay-Z?
what the hell does it even MEAN to be "more black"??
opinions can differ. her be-all-end-all argument that
hip-hop is inherently African seems to run into a wall
when the flag bearers of hip-hop culture say that isn't
necessarily the case.
those "flag bearers" aren't real hip-hop you say? they're sellouts you say?
frauds? confused? sacrificed to the machinations of capitalism?
well, i guess i wouldn't know. i'm asian. i'm not black enough to discern
what's real and what isn't. I'll be out back figuringout ways to
reinvent the sound of picking rice so i dont offend the author and
impede her on her quest for freedom and black power.....
.....BY ALIENATING OTHER BLACKS
[this is the kind of crap i have to talk about in school. i guess it could be worse]
Sep 17, 2003
Sep 15, 2003
I'm currently sitting on the floor of tina's room on my laptop. it seems i've had internet everywhere except my own room. it's a long story, but at the very least we have internet at our house now, we just have yet to setup our network and right now the router in tina's room is very far from my room, so until we either get a wireless router or figure out an easier way to wire my room, i'll just sit on her floor when i need access. while i'm here, decided it was time for a post.
Cal found this somewhere. I thought it was pretty neat.
"You know in romantic comedies when the lead and their love interest are in the scene where they are at a dinner party with tons of other guests and conversation is going on all around them, some of which they are even involved in, for they are the leading couple, but then there is that moment. You know, the moment where the couple’s eyes lock. They communicate without any words spoken. Things no one else is aware of. They are still present with everyone else but they have checked out for a bit. This individual, romantic experience is had and no one else has any clue. There is something similar that happens in the corporate worship experience that is truly amazing and transcending. I mean we know that our convening with God is not confined to any specific moment of any specific day, so what makes, say, a Sunday morning any more special than a Tuesday in the middle of traffic on our drive home? Is God less present on Tuesday? No. Yet, there is something so different and other than when we are in a room full of people that have gathered in the name of Christ. But the thing that really sends my head spinning is that we can be in the middle of this corporate experience and feel like we have the sole attention of God. In the middle of a crowd, it’s just the two of us in this beautiful exchange. And these other individual’s voices who believe, no less than I, to have his total attention start to blend with mine. It doesn’t lessen my individual experience it only deepens and heightens the romance somehow. All of these individual voices blending to one. "
Cal found this somewhere. I thought it was pretty neat.
"You know in romantic comedies when the lead and their love interest are in the scene where they are at a dinner party with tons of other guests and conversation is going on all around them, some of which they are even involved in, for they are the leading couple, but then there is that moment. You know, the moment where the couple’s eyes lock. They communicate without any words spoken. Things no one else is aware of. They are still present with everyone else but they have checked out for a bit. This individual, romantic experience is had and no one else has any clue. There is something similar that happens in the corporate worship experience that is truly amazing and transcending. I mean we know that our convening with God is not confined to any specific moment of any specific day, so what makes, say, a Sunday morning any more special than a Tuesday in the middle of traffic on our drive home? Is God less present on Tuesday? No. Yet, there is something so different and other than when we are in a room full of people that have gathered in the name of Christ. But the thing that really sends my head spinning is that we can be in the middle of this corporate experience and feel like we have the sole attention of God. In the middle of a crowd, it’s just the two of us in this beautiful exchange. And these other individual’s voices who believe, no less than I, to have his total attention start to blend with mine. It doesn’t lessen my individual experience it only deepens and heightens the romance somehow. All of these individual voices blending to one. "
Sep 9, 2003
back at the library. i'm slowly beginning to cherish the online opportunity being here brings.
that is....until we get internet at home.....at which point i'll probably never step foot into this building again until i have an overdue book to return.....
i have to say being in the frigid confines of the computer lab aren't really condusive to deep and analytical thinking, so i don't have much to share on that front. it'll just have to wait until i'm in more of a philisophical mood i suppose. but to tide you all over, here are some random observations from my first week back here in london.
- there are a dissproportionate amount of blondes on this campus. either western is the centre of all blonde jokes, or there's a shortage of hair dye somewhere.
- "energy conservation" is not applicable to educational institutions (at least from what i've seen)
- everyone has a laptop
- the best profs are all hippies
- internet is vital to a university student's life
- art has been commodified to a point where trying to be avant garde has lost all sense of meaning
- most students only care about grades as opposed to what they're actually learning
- most students care more about getting days off on their schedule than grades
- multiculturalism is a sham reserved for university admissions books and macleans pictorials
- if you're cynical and jaded coming into school, you'll love it here
- fellowship is really really really really important
and now to go eat a dinner of hotdogs and maybe some imitation fruit loops. mmm.....
that is....until we get internet at home.....at which point i'll probably never step foot into this building again until i have an overdue book to return.....
i have to say being in the frigid confines of the computer lab aren't really condusive to deep and analytical thinking, so i don't have much to share on that front. it'll just have to wait until i'm in more of a philisophical mood i suppose. but to tide you all over, here are some random observations from my first week back here in london.
- there are a dissproportionate amount of blondes on this campus. either western is the centre of all blonde jokes, or there's a shortage of hair dye somewhere.
- "energy conservation" is not applicable to educational institutions (at least from what i've seen)
- everyone has a laptop
- the best profs are all hippies
- internet is vital to a university student's life
- art has been commodified to a point where trying to be avant garde has lost all sense of meaning
- most students only care about grades as opposed to what they're actually learning
- most students care more about getting days off on their schedule than grades
- multiculturalism is a sham reserved for university admissions books and macleans pictorials
- if you're cynical and jaded coming into school, you'll love it here
- fellowship is really really really really important
and now to go eat a dinner of hotdogs and maybe some imitation fruit loops. mmm.....
Sep 8, 2003
at weldon on my laptop right now. finally get a chance to update the blog, although i have no pics or anything on my laptop so we'll all have to live with irene and wendy a bit longer. at the very least, its nice having internet on my laptop instead of depending on the library computers. they suck.
also it's an excuse to get used to typing on this thing.
classes have been interesting thusfar. for some reason i'm strangely interested in actually learning this year. i've been void of this feeling my entire academic past, but for some reason the last few days i've been really encouraged to actually utilize the privilage i have of being here studing things i'm actually interested in. i talk to some of my profs and i feel the slightest hint of......admiration??? who AM I???
also it's an excuse to get used to typing on this thing.
classes have been interesting thusfar. for some reason i'm strangely interested in actually learning this year. i've been void of this feeling my entire academic past, but for some reason the last few days i've been really encouraged to actually utilize the privilage i have of being here studing things i'm actually interested in. i talk to some of my profs and i feel the slightest hint of......admiration??? who AM I???
Aug 28, 2003
:::GARAGE SALE PICTURES:::
there's some stuff in those pictures that have essentially been sold already, and there's a lot of stuff that i didn't take pictures of.
there are a few more chairs, a few more bookshelves, desks/storage tables, and assorted trinkits including stickvacs, car deck w/cd player, computer stuff, sewing stuff, misc. household trinkits, outdoors stuff (gardening, toboganning, etc.) stationary (envelopes, white board, msg board, etc.) and i have a ton of clothes, lots of it unworn and name brand stuff. i also have some purses my mom doesn't want anymore. also name brand stuff (prada, gucci....etc). shoes, boots, and most of all though is the furniture. lots of bookshelves and desks. come one come all. saturday morning at 9am to 12am approx.
if you're interested in anything in the photos, call me or email me and we'll see if we can work out a time for you to drop by my house and check stuff out before saturday.
this is ideal fo you guys just moving into places of your own for the first time when school starts because i have a ton of pretty useful crap.
i also have a ton of useful crap your parents might like, so bring them along too, haha
there's some stuff in those pictures that have essentially been sold already, and there's a lot of stuff that i didn't take pictures of.
there are a few more chairs, a few more bookshelves, desks/storage tables, and assorted trinkits including stickvacs, car deck w/cd player, computer stuff, sewing stuff, misc. household trinkits, outdoors stuff (gardening, toboganning, etc.) stationary (envelopes, white board, msg board, etc.) and i have a ton of clothes, lots of it unworn and name brand stuff. i also have some purses my mom doesn't want anymore. also name brand stuff (prada, gucci....etc). shoes, boots, and most of all though is the furniture. lots of bookshelves and desks. come one come all. saturday morning at 9am to 12am approx.
if you're interested in anything in the photos, call me or email me and we'll see if we can work out a time for you to drop by my house and check stuff out before saturday.
this is ideal fo you guys just moving into places of your own for the first time when school starts because i have a ton of pretty useful crap.
i also have a ton of useful crap your parents might like, so bring them along too, haha
Aug 26, 2003
chinese people are really bad at basketball.
these are the clips of the best moves thusfar from the Nike Battleground Asia streetball tourny.
apparently, a layup is worth making into a slowmotion clip in hong kong. i think it's funnier that some clips don't even show the guys MAKING layups. just attempting them.
man. they suck.
on the bright side, the girls are more impressive than the guys. and that "classroom freestyle" clip is really really funny.
on the sad side, it looks like instead of a dunk contest, they had.......a layup contest??? what the hell....?
these are the clips of the best moves thusfar from the Nike Battleground Asia streetball tourny.
apparently, a layup is worth making into a slowmotion clip in hong kong. i think it's funnier that some clips don't even show the guys MAKING layups. just attempting them.
man. they suck.
on the bright side, the girls are more impressive than the guys. and that "classroom freestyle" clip is really really funny.
on the sad side, it looks like instead of a dunk contest, they had.......a layup contest??? what the hell....?
Aug 25, 2003
*irene and wendy at macgregor point provincial park*
(i only took 10 pictures the entire trip. i pulled my camera out with about 15 minutes to go before we left the park, so forgive my lack of photos).
camping and garage sale pics are up at imagestation.
regarding the garage sale stuff, i took pictures mainly of just the large furniture. there's actually more bookshelves and cabinets and what not that i didn't take pictures of because they were covered by other junk. also, generally anything you see in a picture is for sale. so a lot of the stuff on shelves and sitting on the floor or on tables is for sale. i'll note in the picture description when something particularly isn't for sale.
as to prices, email me about a certain item and we'll work something out. i haven't set real prices or made any sort of inventory or anything yet.
(i only took 10 pictures the entire trip. i pulled my camera out with about 15 minutes to go before we left the park, so forgive my lack of photos).
camping and garage sale pics are up at imagestation.
regarding the garage sale stuff, i took pictures mainly of just the large furniture. there's actually more bookshelves and cabinets and what not that i didn't take pictures of because they were covered by other junk. also, generally anything you see in a picture is for sale. so a lot of the stuff on shelves and sitting on the floor or on tables is for sale. i'll note in the picture description when something particularly isn't for sale.
as to prices, email me about a certain item and we'll work something out. i haven't set real prices or made any sort of inventory or anything yet.
FINALLY.
page is back up. will have more updates later tonight including a new background, new gallery at imagestation of this past weekend's camping trip as well as further updates on the progress of "simon sells his stuff, part 1"
in totally unrelated news, i've come to the following conclusions in the last few days.
rogers technical support is way to complex. if they would just streamline their customer service network i bet they could save hundreds and thousands of dollars in wages and still be more efficient. for example....why do i need to be put on hold and transfered to 3 different depts when all i want is to ask why my account was disconnected? can't they just ask FOR me and then tell me? yeesh.
also, women in long lines take longer when they get to the front. i was in a long line this morning and every woman would take like, 15 minutes to do the same thing that all the guys took about 6 seconds to do. conclusion?
women don't mind taking a long time to do things when they have to be done.
men prefer to prepare things before hand in order to do whatever they're doing as fast as possible once it needs to be done.
what does this teach us? nothing really. except that if you're in a long line of women.....prepare for a long wait.
page is back up. will have more updates later tonight including a new background, new gallery at imagestation of this past weekend's camping trip as well as further updates on the progress of "simon sells his stuff, part 1"
in totally unrelated news, i've come to the following conclusions in the last few days.
rogers technical support is way to complex. if they would just streamline their customer service network i bet they could save hundreds and thousands of dollars in wages and still be more efficient. for example....why do i need to be put on hold and transfered to 3 different depts when all i want is to ask why my account was disconnected? can't they just ask FOR me and then tell me? yeesh.
also, women in long lines take longer when they get to the front. i was in a long line this morning and every woman would take like, 15 minutes to do the same thing that all the guys took about 6 seconds to do. conclusion?
women don't mind taking a long time to do things when they have to be done.
men prefer to prepare things before hand in order to do whatever they're doing as fast as possible once it needs to be done.
what does this teach us? nothing really. except that if you're in a long line of women.....prepare for a long wait.
Aug 17, 2003
phew.
the moving went good. was quick and clean, no real snags or anything. it's still really wierd not living at my house anymore. i went by twice to pick stuff up before i headed home tonight, and i just felt....wrong.
i'm also feeling a bit whiny about living so darn far from everybody. i have to drive all the way up to highway 7. i guess it'll be even worse when i move into my real house, cuz that's closer to 16th than it is 7. argh.
oh well...i guess i have to concede the fact that i'm going to be a 905'er from now on.
great, now i'm all depressed.
on the bright side, tons of stuff to sell. should make for good times. pics up within the week.
this has been an update of nothing what i did today. oh well, too tired to think.
the moving went good. was quick and clean, no real snags or anything. it's still really wierd not living at my house anymore. i went by twice to pick stuff up before i headed home tonight, and i just felt....wrong.
i'm also feeling a bit whiny about living so darn far from everybody. i have to drive all the way up to highway 7. i guess it'll be even worse when i move into my real house, cuz that's closer to 16th than it is 7. argh.
oh well...i guess i have to concede the fact that i'm going to be a 905'er from now on.
great, now i'm all depressed.
on the bright side, tons of stuff to sell. should make for good times. pics up within the week.
this has been an update of nothing what i did today. oh well, too tired to think.
Aug 12, 2003
moving day is coming up really quick, so it's been rather hectic what with a mixture of packing and procrastinating from packing.
again, i want to let the world know that i'll be hawking my unwanted wares starting saturday night likely. i'll post an imagestation gallery devoted to the crap i'm selling, and i'll probably have an actual sale day where you guys can come and ravage the remains of my house.
please pass the word along to any other poor university students you know who'd like to get cheap goods for my monetary benefit. i have a tone of desks and other officey furniture, along with trinkits, electronics and yadda yadda....you'll see in a few days i guess when i ship all our stuff out and leave all the cra...uh, i mean, goods.
i think the band i started with cam and steph (to which we added herb as a fly-boy) is pretty much dead. i've been just way too busy as of late. which is ironical, because it's i who claimed their apathy for my previous solo jaunt.
ahhh......isn't it funny how things turn out.
c'est la vie.
again, i want to let the world know that i'll be hawking my unwanted wares starting saturday night likely. i'll post an imagestation gallery devoted to the crap i'm selling, and i'll probably have an actual sale day where you guys can come and ravage the remains of my house.
please pass the word along to any other poor university students you know who'd like to get cheap goods for my monetary benefit. i have a tone of desks and other officey furniture, along with trinkits, electronics and yadda yadda....you'll see in a few days i guess when i ship all our stuff out and leave all the cra...uh, i mean, goods.
i think the band i started with cam and steph (to which we added herb as a fly-boy) is pretty much dead. i've been just way too busy as of late. which is ironical, because it's i who claimed their apathy for my previous solo jaunt.
ahhh......isn't it funny how things turn out.
c'est la vie.
Aug 10, 2003
went down to the taste of the danforth tonight. observed some amusing behaviour.
i find parents believe that if they're carrying a child, the world should stop in order to cater to their needs. i guess the stress of taking care of kids will do that to you.
one lady pushing a stroller whined constantly that people kept walking in front of her, so she couldn't forge ahead. imagine THAT. a crowd. where people walk. in front of you. hm....
there was this OTHER lady who was carrying a baby, and just using it to push people out of her way. it was pretty funny.....a little human battering ram.
i think it's scary that you can care about someone so much that situations that would normally not phase you - when those you care about are placed in them - you want to have the ability to transcend time and space just so you can go back and kick someones ass.
i mean...you'd think that with the ability to go anywhere at any time, you'd do something productive.
but nope.
when i think about it, i'd want nothing more than to kick some guys ass.
but then i guess meeting Jesus would be pretty cool. but i have a feeling he'd frown on my wanting to inflict a savage beating. ah, the decisions....
i find parents believe that if they're carrying a child, the world should stop in order to cater to their needs. i guess the stress of taking care of kids will do that to you.
one lady pushing a stroller whined constantly that people kept walking in front of her, so she couldn't forge ahead. imagine THAT. a crowd. where people walk. in front of you. hm....
there was this OTHER lady who was carrying a baby, and just using it to push people out of her way. it was pretty funny.....a little human battering ram.
i think it's scary that you can care about someone so much that situations that would normally not phase you - when those you care about are placed in them - you want to have the ability to transcend time and space just so you can go back and kick someones ass.
i mean...you'd think that with the ability to go anywhere at any time, you'd do something productive.
but nope.
when i think about it, i'd want nothing more than to kick some guys ass.
but then i guess meeting Jesus would be pretty cool. but i have a feeling he'd frown on my wanting to inflict a savage beating. ah, the decisions....
Aug 8, 2003
[pic: ryan and dora at second cup]
*per usual, highlight blog title and date to get rid of the grey blog box*
added gabe and dora's picture sites to the links section. go check them out. everyone loves pictures.
exam this saturday.....freedom so close.....i can taste it....
c's birthday on sunday.....bbq so close.....i can taste it....
*per usual, highlight blog title and date to get rid of the grey blog box*
added gabe and dora's picture sites to the links section. go check them out. everyone loves pictures.
exam this saturday.....freedom so close.....i can taste it....
c's birthday on sunday.....bbq so close.....i can taste it....
Aug 7, 2003
the streaming audio for the new dashboard album is up in full at mtv.com
it's pretty much what i expected....standouts include instantly familiar "rapid hope loss" with its classic dashboard, crafted-for-sing song bridge.
dashboard tries to get away from the monotony that surely comes with being the idols of depressed and heart broken teenagers everywhere, but ultimately the best work shines through when he's doing what he's best at - wearing his heart on his sleeve.
with lyrics like
"And try to understand there's an old mistake that fools will make
And I'm the king of them, pushing everything that's good away
So wont you hold me now?"
from 'bend and not break', and
"Just bend the pieces til they fit
Like they were made for it
But, they weren't meant for this
No, they weren't meant for this"
from 'ghost of a good thing', it's apparent that the band is most comfortable when crying themselves to sleep at night.
attempts at more upbeat songs include 'hands down' (redone from the so impossible EP) as essentially the live version they play at concerts, and 'as lovers go' which is catchy but as is the problem with most of dashboards happy songs (the original hands down excluded) lack the inspiration or emotion that are the bands trademark. furthermore, while the front 5 tracks of the album are excellent and unique, the middle and tail end of the album seems to lack any sort of direction and starts to all sound the same. after a while, you realize the whining is only cool when the music behind it is good. without better song writing, the lyrics are just kind of pathetic.
i present this final lyric from 'carry this picture' as evidence:
"I'll give you this picture and keep it and dont be scared,
And color the coast with your smile.
Its the most genuine thing I've ever seen.
I was so lost and now I believe.
I believe in the coast."
......suffice to say.....i'm not impressed. keep on crying buddy. for all our sakes....and don't take this personally... but i hope women keep crushing your heart so your next album will be even better.
it's pretty much what i expected....standouts include instantly familiar "rapid hope loss" with its classic dashboard, crafted-for-sing song bridge.
dashboard tries to get away from the monotony that surely comes with being the idols of depressed and heart broken teenagers everywhere, but ultimately the best work shines through when he's doing what he's best at - wearing his heart on his sleeve.
with lyrics like
"And try to understand there's an old mistake that fools will make
And I'm the king of them, pushing everything that's good away
So wont you hold me now?"
from 'bend and not break', and
"Just bend the pieces til they fit
Like they were made for it
But, they weren't meant for this
No, they weren't meant for this"
from 'ghost of a good thing', it's apparent that the band is most comfortable when crying themselves to sleep at night.
attempts at more upbeat songs include 'hands down' (redone from the so impossible EP) as essentially the live version they play at concerts, and 'as lovers go' which is catchy but as is the problem with most of dashboards happy songs (the original hands down excluded) lack the inspiration or emotion that are the bands trademark. furthermore, while the front 5 tracks of the album are excellent and unique, the middle and tail end of the album seems to lack any sort of direction and starts to all sound the same. after a while, you realize the whining is only cool when the music behind it is good. without better song writing, the lyrics are just kind of pathetic.
i present this final lyric from 'carry this picture' as evidence:
"I'll give you this picture and keep it and dont be scared,
And color the coast with your smile.
Its the most genuine thing I've ever seen.
I was so lost and now I believe.
I believe in the coast."
......suffice to say.....i'm not impressed. keep on crying buddy. for all our sakes....and don't take this personally... but i hope women keep crushing your heart so your next album will be even better.
Aug 5, 2003
today i found myself wishing i was more into photography.
i think it's really easy to take interesting photos if you just take the time to inspect your surroundings and make a note of what captures your attention. you can be in the same house, walk down the same street, sit in the same chair everyday of your life but it's how that routine responds to changes, and how you view the routine itself that determines the little cool things that make a good photo. maybe one day a rock is just a rock. but at the right time, with the right light, and the right background, it could be a great photo.
i suppose that's the definition of thinking optimistically when you consider it. seeing in everything the potential for greatness as opposed to seeing in everything the potential for failure.
i love how our human interactions and relationships sort of works the same way. I've never understoof people who say after a while someone's mannerisms and quirks get annoying and old. shouldn't it be exactly the other way around? that after spending time with your friends or significant other long enough, their little idiosyncrasies are exactly the things that make you so close to them and care about them?
i'm pretty sure i've said this a billion times, but it's always encouraging when you actually recognize the beauty evident in the people around us and the relationships we have.
maybe that's why there's few photographs more beautiful in my mind than the ones that capture the everyday essence of life. because everyone says a rainbow or a baby are beautiful. Those are almost 'generic' beauty if such a thing existed. but when you look at a photo of something we normally ignore in our daily rush through life and understand why the person who took it thought it was worth taking a photo of....well. now thats a photo.
i think it's really easy to take interesting photos if you just take the time to inspect your surroundings and make a note of what captures your attention. you can be in the same house, walk down the same street, sit in the same chair everyday of your life but it's how that routine responds to changes, and how you view the routine itself that determines the little cool things that make a good photo. maybe one day a rock is just a rock. but at the right time, with the right light, and the right background, it could be a great photo.
i suppose that's the definition of thinking optimistically when you consider it. seeing in everything the potential for greatness as opposed to seeing in everything the potential for failure.
i love how our human interactions and relationships sort of works the same way. I've never understoof people who say after a while someone's mannerisms and quirks get annoying and old. shouldn't it be exactly the other way around? that after spending time with your friends or significant other long enough, their little idiosyncrasies are exactly the things that make you so close to them and care about them?
i'm pretty sure i've said this a billion times, but it's always encouraging when you actually recognize the beauty evident in the people around us and the relationships we have.
maybe that's why there's few photographs more beautiful in my mind than the ones that capture the everyday essence of life. because everyone says a rainbow or a baby are beautiful. Those are almost 'generic' beauty if such a thing existed. but when you look at a photo of something we normally ignore in our daily rush through life and understand why the person who took it thought it was worth taking a photo of....well. now thats a photo.
Aug 1, 2003
i just ate 3/4 of a bag of nacho cheese bugles and now i feel really gross. let this be a lesson.....corn snacks are only good in moderation...
anyways, on to the daily rant. today's topic of criticism: chinese music.
why is it there's no good chinese music? it's all pop, or bad rap, or other prepackaged bubble-gummy garbage that has been done to death a billion times in a billion languages. much the way GOOD music transcends language, i believe CRAP music is universally understood to be crap no matter where you are.
so what's the deal chinks?
i mean, japan has a GREAT music scene. sure, they have the pop stuff, but they also have really talented bands and musicians. Artists like DJ Krush, P5, Nine Days Wonder, Melt Banana...i could go on. And japanese music snobs are just as elitist as their north american counterparts. They love the =W=eez, and they're constantly pushing the envelope of math/alt-rock and other experimental genres of music.
there seems to be an abundance of creative energy in japan (just look at all the video games they make).
why is it HK is so different? how is it that i've yet to ever hear of a single Chinese artist who knows how to bring the rock? or forget rock! i've never heard of any good indie chinese music, no punk, no hip-hop, NOTHING. i find it hard to believe in a city that crowded there isn't one good artist. it's mind blowing.
i mean.....mainland china, they have that whole communist thing working against creative freedom, but you'd think in HK someone would have stood up by now and said "yo man. this yes-card music sucks". you'd think there would be some sort of underground scene, and you'd think someone would have made themselves a bit of a name here.
but nope.
are chinese people destined to listen to bad music? what does that SAY about our culture? it's vexing indeed.
no offense to those who enjoy chinese pop.
i think jay chow is great.
FOR ME TO POOP ON.
hehheh.....and i'm turning 21 this year folks. why is it when you're young, older people always seem so old. but when you get to be their age, you feel so immature? enh...that's a rant for another day.
anyways, on to the daily rant. today's topic of criticism: chinese music.
why is it there's no good chinese music? it's all pop, or bad rap, or other prepackaged bubble-gummy garbage that has been done to death a billion times in a billion languages. much the way GOOD music transcends language, i believe CRAP music is universally understood to be crap no matter where you are.
so what's the deal chinks?
i mean, japan has a GREAT music scene. sure, they have the pop stuff, but they also have really talented bands and musicians. Artists like DJ Krush, P5, Nine Days Wonder, Melt Banana...i could go on. And japanese music snobs are just as elitist as their north american counterparts. They love the =W=eez, and they're constantly pushing the envelope of math/alt-rock and other experimental genres of music.
there seems to be an abundance of creative energy in japan (just look at all the video games they make).
why is it HK is so different? how is it that i've yet to ever hear of a single Chinese artist who knows how to bring the rock? or forget rock! i've never heard of any good indie chinese music, no punk, no hip-hop, NOTHING. i find it hard to believe in a city that crowded there isn't one good artist. it's mind blowing.
i mean.....mainland china, they have that whole communist thing working against creative freedom, but you'd think in HK someone would have stood up by now and said "yo man. this yes-card music sucks". you'd think there would be some sort of underground scene, and you'd think someone would have made themselves a bit of a name here.
but nope.
are chinese people destined to listen to bad music? what does that SAY about our culture? it's vexing indeed.
no offense to those who enjoy chinese pop.
i think jay chow is great.
FOR ME TO POOP ON.
hehheh.....and i'm turning 21 this year folks. why is it when you're young, older people always seem so old. but when you get to be their age, you feel so immature? enh...that's a rant for another day.
Jul 31, 2003
this is really really cool.
kinda makes you wanna run out and be nice to everyone you see huh?
in totally unrelated news.....the japanese restaurant across the street from my neighbourhood renovated and got new ownership.
it's really nice now. still small, bit much more modern. it feel warm and intimate as opposed to cramped.
oh, and the foods good.
kinda makes you wanna run out and be nice to everyone you see huh?
in totally unrelated news.....the japanese restaurant across the street from my neighbourhood renovated and got new ownership.
it's really nice now. still small, bit much more modern. it feel warm and intimate as opposed to cramped.
oh, and the foods good.
Jul 30, 2003
i was reading my yearbook grad comment....and i wrote something surprisingly wise that i didn't even recall writing.
"...i thank God, for having faith in me, even when i didn't have faith in Him"
how profound this is in hindsight. it's something i keep having to remind myself every day when i wake up, and every nigth before i go to sleep. it's something i can't even comprehend a majority of the time i realize it, yet i know to be heart wrenchingly true.
it's what i use to keep me in line when i can't seem to focus. the experience of God's grace and how real it is to me.
to take a page out of amy's blog.....i will spontaneously list things i'm thankful for....
- that God will never give up on me.
- the love from that knowledge that allows me to love others
- the people i love
- water bottles
- music
- chinese food
- opportunity
- freedom
and finally....
- that people are researching why yawning is contagious.
neat huh?
"...i thank God, for having faith in me, even when i didn't have faith in Him"
how profound this is in hindsight. it's something i keep having to remind myself every day when i wake up, and every nigth before i go to sleep. it's something i can't even comprehend a majority of the time i realize it, yet i know to be heart wrenchingly true.
it's what i use to keep me in line when i can't seem to focus. the experience of God's grace and how real it is to me.
to take a page out of amy's blog.....i will spontaneously list things i'm thankful for....
- that God will never give up on me.
- the love from that knowledge that allows me to love others
- the people i love
- water bottles
- music
- chinese food
- opportunity
- freedom
and finally....
- that people are researching why yawning is contagious.
neat huh?
Jul 29, 2003
the trailer for Bubba Ho-Tep is up. This is the new Bruce Campbell movie coming out soon from the creators of Army of Darkness. From the looks of the trailer, it appears it will meet the lofty expectations evil dead fans will have of it. i can't wait.
shop smart.
shop s-mart.
shop smart.
shop s-mart.
Jul 27, 2003
slight change of plans! i'm no longer having a garage sale!
let me explain....
instead of hauling everything out and going through all that trouble, i think when i move my family is just going to leave everything we don't want in the old house since we still have it for a few months.
afterwards than, it means everything still left in the house will be on sale. no fuss, no muss. just come over and pillage anything you see, cuz if it's here, it means we no longer want it. make sense? cool.
so now it really IS a liquidation sale.....or a contents sale, whatever, haha it'll be sometime after august 18th, don't know when yet. but i'll keep everyone posted.
also, i uploaded the pictures from Nappy's BBQ. dogs are pretty fun to photograph, i must concede...
let me explain....
instead of hauling everything out and going through all that trouble, i think when i move my family is just going to leave everything we don't want in the old house since we still have it for a few months.
afterwards than, it means everything still left in the house will be on sale. no fuss, no muss. just come over and pillage anything you see, cuz if it's here, it means we no longer want it. make sense? cool.
so now it really IS a liquidation sale.....or a contents sale, whatever, haha it'll be sometime after august 18th, don't know when yet. but i'll keep everyone posted.
also, i uploaded the pictures from Nappy's BBQ. dogs are pretty fun to photograph, i must concede...
Jul 25, 2003
time for a random update post.
volunteered today....bloorview has been pretty cool i have to say. It's basically babysitting, nothing different from playing with normal kids really. it does however really make you grateful for how lucky you are. i take the fact that i can kick a ball standing up for granted. and these are just kids! i can totally understand how some people would devote their lives to aiding the disabled. it's not necessarily something i'd consider personally, but i'd totally understand how some people could do it.
spent some time with parents.....played ball.....then went to east sides for some half-price appetizers. cheap food is great. much thanks to ry for treating us all. a grand round of bum cupping is in order indeed.
in other 'whats-going-on-in-my-life' news, i can't complain. i've been contemplating looking for a second, more "real" job, but i'm pretty happy with the way my summers been so far.
actually, i could go so far as to say this has been one of my favourite summers ever so far, with lots of trips and stuff still planned for august to look forward too. i'm actually so happy lately i feel guilty. i have no clue what i've ever done to deserve all that i have. I have to keep reminding myself to thank God, and really it's been a summer of endless praise. It's so much harder to stay focused in Him when everything's coasting along because you forget why you need him. there's that complacency thing again.....but i'm dealing with it better than before thankfully.
it's not often in my life i've felt like this, so i'm gonna milk it for all its worth. i guess God forgives me for playing rock/paper/scissors in church after all! woohoo!
Rev. Lee however......
in unrelated news, anyone who's ever played DDR, u can be amused by people who are really good.
well...i stumbled upon this clip of someone playing a similar type of musical game, and it's RIDICULOUS. i think even people who don't know what i'm talking about should watch this.
everyone....DOWNLOAD THIS CLIP.
volunteered today....bloorview has been pretty cool i have to say. It's basically babysitting, nothing different from playing with normal kids really. it does however really make you grateful for how lucky you are. i take the fact that i can kick a ball standing up for granted. and these are just kids! i can totally understand how some people would devote their lives to aiding the disabled. it's not necessarily something i'd consider personally, but i'd totally understand how some people could do it.
spent some time with parents.....played ball.....then went to east sides for some half-price appetizers. cheap food is great. much thanks to ry for treating us all. a grand round of bum cupping is in order indeed.
in other 'whats-going-on-in-my-life' news, i can't complain. i've been contemplating looking for a second, more "real" job, but i'm pretty happy with the way my summers been so far.
actually, i could go so far as to say this has been one of my favourite summers ever so far, with lots of trips and stuff still planned for august to look forward too. i'm actually so happy lately i feel guilty. i have no clue what i've ever done to deserve all that i have. I have to keep reminding myself to thank God, and really it's been a summer of endless praise. It's so much harder to stay focused in Him when everything's coasting along because you forget why you need him. there's that complacency thing again.....but i'm dealing with it better than before thankfully.
it's not often in my life i've felt like this, so i'm gonna milk it for all its worth. i guess God forgives me for playing rock/paper/scissors in church after all! woohoo!
Rev. Lee however......
in unrelated news, anyone who's ever played DDR, u can be amused by people who are really good.
well...i stumbled upon this clip of someone playing a similar type of musical game, and it's RIDICULOUS. i think even people who don't know what i'm talking about should watch this.
everyone....DOWNLOAD THIS CLIP.
Jul 24, 2003
i was hoping to leave my notice about my impending liquidation of personal belongings up as long as possible to maximize its exposure to the many (read: 3) people who frequent my site. but i'm really bored and people are starting to make fun of my flower background so i feel obligated to respond.
i took this picture! i thought it turned out pretty well. so here it is. i'm not a pansy, damn you all. moving on.
it seems like a lot of the people in my life are going through some low patches right now. ok, maybe not low patches, but at the very least a lot of people in my life seem to have had better days at the moment. Especially going through the blogs/sites of my friends, the negative and problematic certainly outweigh the positive.
is it depressing? well....no. not really. everyone goes through low points. it's no help if i get depressed. my job as a friend is to encourage, support and advise when possible.
i can't be sure....but you know what i think is the biggest problem with a lot of people though? myself included, because i think it's personally a problem: complacency.
we're far too comfortable in our lives. we're too used to our regular routine. too unwilling to step out of our comfort zone. to take risks, to challenge ourselves more than we were challenged the previous day.
i look at myself, and i look at those around me, and i see a pattern of apathy towards change. we all pine for change, but do nothing about it. we're too used to what we're comfortable doing, and we're not going out of our way to grow, to learn.
passion is the key to life. passion for God. passion for living life.
reasons for passion may differ. you may be spiritual, you may be practical, whatever. but passion in any of it forms must exist, or life becomes mundane to the point of being unbearable. you'll start to question existence.
the second you wonder what life is for, the moment you take it for granted, you must realize you're too comfortable i think. you've lost your passion, for whatever it may be.
it's important to find what you really care about, what you feel gives you strength, and to hold on to it. respect it, cherish it and be honest to it. otherwise, things tend to get real tough, real fast....
i took this picture! i thought it turned out pretty well. so here it is. i'm not a pansy, damn you all. moving on.
it seems like a lot of the people in my life are going through some low patches right now. ok, maybe not low patches, but at the very least a lot of people in my life seem to have had better days at the moment. Especially going through the blogs/sites of my friends, the negative and problematic certainly outweigh the positive.
is it depressing? well....no. not really. everyone goes through low points. it's no help if i get depressed. my job as a friend is to encourage, support and advise when possible.
i can't be sure....but you know what i think is the biggest problem with a lot of people though? myself included, because i think it's personally a problem: complacency.
we're far too comfortable in our lives. we're too used to our regular routine. too unwilling to step out of our comfort zone. to take risks, to challenge ourselves more than we were challenged the previous day.
i look at myself, and i look at those around me, and i see a pattern of apathy towards change. we all pine for change, but do nothing about it. we're too used to what we're comfortable doing, and we're not going out of our way to grow, to learn.
passion is the key to life. passion for God. passion for living life.
reasons for passion may differ. you may be spiritual, you may be practical, whatever. but passion in any of it forms must exist, or life becomes mundane to the point of being unbearable. you'll start to question existence.
the second you wonder what life is for, the moment you take it for granted, you must realize you're too comfortable i think. you've lost your passion, for whatever it may be.
it's important to find what you really care about, what you feel gives you strength, and to hold on to it. respect it, cherish it and be honest to it. otherwise, things tend to get real tough, real fast....
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