Jun 30, 2003

Saw this site linked from kicksology and gave it a check. It's SOOOO cool!
Crooked Tongues
yes, i'm obsessed with sneakers. yes, this is an excellent sneaker site.

that is all for today.

Jun 27, 2003

i finally got around to fixing the pics page. haven't posted anything on imagestation yet, but all you guys can feel free to throw your pictures up there and stuff if you want. it's a communal archive, so don't be shy!

Jun 24, 2003

TheStar.com - Top stars to join Stones in T.O. show

the second i see justin timberlake sharing the stage with AC/DC, i can start praying knowing the end times are near.

Jun 21, 2003

ever open up blogger just for the sake of blogging, then sit in front of a screen for a good half hour typing and deleting and retyping dozens of possible posts before you just give up and post a load of crap?

yea. thats me now.

i hate when you have a bunch to say, and no one to say it to. that's the problem with having your pensive, self-reflective moments at 3:15am i guess.

Jun 17, 2003

ok.
so i've been getting a fair amount of email fowards about this....and enough people seem to have been talking about it that i feel the urge to rant about it. Gay marriages are now legal here in Ontario.

and you know what i say - as a Christian, and as a member of our society? I say - fine. I have nothing against Gay people getting married. I've been starting to get really peeved by everyone claiming hellfire and brimstone about this, and how we can't let such sin occur right in our city and country and yadda yadda.....and i like, TOTALLY think it's nuts to take that stance. to BAN Gay's from marriage - i think - is the type of thinking that starts religious wars. it is oppression of other, and imposition of beliefs on others.

I think C.S. Lewis makes a parallel point about marriage in his book Mere Christianity.
"A great many people seem to think that if you are a Christian yourself you should try to make divorce difficult for every one. I do not think that. At least I know I should be very angry if the Mohammedans tried to prevent the rest of us from drinking wine. My own view is that the Churches should frankly recognise that the majority of the British people are not Christians and, therefore, cannot be expected to live Christian lives."

do i think homosexuality is a sin? yes. it's in the bible (Genesis 19). but what does that have to do with marrital status? What happened to hate the sin, not the sinner? will preventing gays from marrying reduce the number of gays? no. will it help spread Christ's words and love? no. beating someone over the head and denying them the same rights as us based on religious beliefs is fundamentally wrong to me.

Jesus accepted the company of prostitutes because they confessed their sins to Him. As long as they recognized their transgressions, they were saved. Similarly, although homosexuality is a sin, it's still something that can be recognized, and confessed, and worked at.

do i believe it is a scientific/genetic thing? possibly. i'm unaware of any evidence either proving or disproving this theory. but the fact remains that it's a sin. and i think that if God has called it a sin, there must be a way to be forgiven for it and cleansed before God's eyes if someone truly seeks to be saved.

warfare against gay marriage - to me - is hypocrisy. It is Christian conservatism taken too far....and is along the same lines as pro-life terrorism. WWJD? can you really see Jesus running down to jarvis and church and screaming into a megaphone that a certain group of people should be denied equal rights as others?

did Jesus believe in segregating the lepers? the prostitues? the gentiles?

no. Jesus came to save all of us. gays included. They are sinners, but you know what? so am I. so are you. so is everyone else in the world. What gives us the right to judge our sins as less than theirs? that we're "better" than them? is our lying, our lustful thoughts, our pride.....are these sins not as evil as homosexuality?

not to God. at least that's what i believe. we're ALL sinners.
I don't SUPPORT gay marriages. i'm not gonna go down and celebrate a victory or anything. but i accept it. i think it's fair. And to the next Christian who tells me we have to stop this, to pray for an appeal, and that the world is going to hell around us:

yes. it always has been, and it always will be. That's why Jesus came in the first place.

now, i ask YOU, as a Christian - what are you gonna do about it?
this pic was from cammie's wonderful day of excitment. refered to in some history books as "last saturday". what can i say? steph is a middle child. i think that's all you have to know. poor...poor bri....

i also added some more links to my stalking list. woohoo!

Jun 14, 2003

hm....
you ever get really bored and start looking through people's ICQ info? i know i do that every so often. one of my favourite past-times is looking for people's webpages, because i enjoy going through sites of people i know. they're such microcosm's of their lives, as i'm sure this site is of mine.

it actually makes me feel kind of bad when i go through the info of a friend i haven't talked to much in YEARS and go through their website. you realize how much time has occured since you've lost touch.....how much life has gone by unshared with each other. I've always been one to sort of go with the flow.....keep in touch with who i can, and i can admit that i'm really not one to make an extra effort to stay connected with people when i don't see them for a while.

i think this is something lots of us university students have to sorta "deal" with. I have to say however, that i'd much rather lose touch with a bunch of people and maintain/keep deveeloping some real frienships rather than cling on to old ones half assed. i believe i'd rather drift away from someone mutually than have them every once in a while ICQ me or something with no actual interest in my life, or intention to develop a relationship, but merely out of obligation and to make themselves feel better.

don't get me wrong, i'm not talking about specific people or situations. i'm merely saying that i don't believe there's anything wrong with drifting because as long as you know how to get a hold of the person, you can always get together and touch base with them when you decide you actually wanna chat and see whats going on with their lives.

i'm pretty much in awe at the amount of superficiality there is in this world. how much emphasis we put on facades and outward impressions.

but does not putting that extra effort - to msg someone just for the sake of keeping in tough....even when you have nothing to really talk about..... - does that make me a bad person? a bad friend?

you know.....i don't think it does. and people who are concious of this and feel bad about it, i don't think you should. why? well, go ask the friends you haven't talked to in a few years if you're a bad friend. my bet is they'll say no. in fact, they'll probably think you're being silly.

being a true friend to me is to be YOU at all times, regardless of what sort of status quo that may or may not buck. i think it's important to remember that sometimes, because it's so easy to lose sight of what friends are all about.
i took a brief stroll down my archives just now. hard to believe this piece of garbage website has been floating around in its various incarnation for 4 years now. i still remember my very first website. it had rainbow swirls in the background and was essentially a giant shrine devoted to Alicia Silverstone, complete with picture and animated torch .gif files.....ah yes, good times.

I managed to even look up one of my old old never finished sites on google.

check out the sadness here.

the links don't even work, except for the links button. yes. it's true...i played a lot of quake back then. you can also see the beginnings of my mp3 addiction. weeee....

Jun 12, 2003

got really bored and started taking random pictures. i thought this turned out pretty funny.

anyways, apparently my parents are more paranoid than i thought, because i was looking through our medicine cabinet today and found a bag of face masks (a la SARS protection).

riiiiight.....and these are the people who are cooking my meals. i wonder what else they aren't telling me...

Jun 8, 2003

been suffering a bit from withdrawl over my deceased mp3 collection lately....i was really not looking forward to the prospect of buying back hundreds of dollars worth of cd's, and having to chose which ones i wanted, then finding them for a decent price.

complicating the situation, the radio SUCKS. asides from 91.1 jazz, there's really no consistantly satisfying station. even 102.1 has been buggin me as of late with its constant insistance on playing theory of a deadman over and over until my ears bleed and i cry for the sweet release of death.

luckily, i was really bored this afternoon and thought i'd give the radio stations on my tv a once over. (thats rogers digital cable, for any of you who have that little plastic box too).

one word: relief.

there is some absolutely EXCELLENT music on the television if any of you digital cable subscribers are also sick of the radio. first, i flipped to the "new rock" station, expecting to here more puddle of mud...but was pleasantly surprised to find them playing tool. "not bad" i thought. lets see what else they got. next up? finch. in my mind, i did a mental sigh of satisfaction. here was a rock station. a real rock station. sure, linkin park was up next, but at least they didn't play any of their singles. this rock station plays non-released songs it seems, and generally good ones at that. can't complain, as it puts 102.1 to shame.

next down the list.....the adultalternative station. curious, i click to find them playing aimee mann. niiiiiice one. next up was some old lemonheads circa my-so-called life soundtrack era. i was instantly sold.

the kicker was the contemporary christian station i think. plays ccm countdown artists, both old a new, from all genres. can't say every song is great, but at least it's a consistent source of christian tunes. I noticed they played the new Jars single. pretty cool.

bonus are the world music, ambient and smooth jazz stations. all nothign exceptional, but better than their radio counterparts by leaps and bounds. (the only other place to find good ambient/downbeat/triphop on the radio is CHRW back in london, but even that's relegated to the 6-7AM time slot on thursday mornings).

so what can i say? i'm quite pleased. although my parents aren't home now, allowing me to crank up the volume on it loud enough for me to hear it down in the basement. i'm assuming my parents won't be too pleased with that when they're home.......hm....

Jun 5, 2003

movie stars spend waaaaaaay too much money on clothes.
it's sick. $1200 american for a purse? uh.....i hope it's a purse that contains an unlimited supply of bread and water, because you could have spent that money doing some good for starving people who need food and drink.

we need to stop idolizing them now, before it gets any more out of hand....

Jun 4, 2003

memorable conversation of the week:

me: "our relationship with God is kind of like....we're abusive husbands who beat the crap out of our wives, and God is the wife, who for some reason beyond us loves us unconditionally regardless of how badly we beat Her...kinda sick eh?"
helen: "yea. It's like we're walking gift certificates that have yet to be redeemed"
me: "oh sure. leave it to a woman to relate everything to shopping"
helen: "and leave it to simon to relate everything to women"
me: "....touche"

maybe you had to be there. just thinking about it makes me laugh so hard it hurts.
you think that as you get older, you start to appreciate your parents more? you start to see the little glimmer of wisdom in their constant nagging?

or do you think as you get older....you can just relate to them more?

maybe a little bit of both i guess.

regardless - i'm going to find me a woman that doesn't eeeever nag.
yes......that is my dream.....

Jun 2, 2003

so i was watching star trek TNG this afternoon (laugh all you want....i love that show). and it was this episode where this guy was addicted to a holodeck program because he could control everything inside the holodeck. He recreated most of the crew and had them all goofy and all the female characters were in love with him. Basically, he was too afraid to deal with the real world, so he sought refuge in his own abilities and his own mind rather then take on the challenge of reality.

long summary short, at the end he manages to conquer his lack of social skills and helps save the ship from a warp-core matter/anti-matter contamination that causes the ship to uncontrollably speed up. (naturally seconds before reaching the hypothetical warp10 they managed to regain control of the warp drive and slow down =)

post-crisis, cmdr. reading rainbow (laforge? i can't spell either part of his name) gives the guy (lt. barkley) a pat on the back and says

"it was nice to have you out in the real world today"

i found that strangely profound. especially since i've watched like, every episode of TNG and never thought God was trying to tell me something before. but as I sat there in all my nerdom, i couldn't help but realize that it's such a reminder to not be discouraged. to not slink back to my sheltered existence where i try to control all the variables - because ultimately i'll lose EVERYTHING if i live in fear. we already know we have to let go of everything...to step into "reality" and let God use us....(to use the episodes analogy, there's no way Lt. Barkley could have taken parts of his holodeck progam with him out into the real world)...but it's just so hard. but i felt really encouraged for some reason.....safe in the reminder that hey - it's not about my individual victories...it's about the ultimate goal. the ship......the world.

we tend to think so small. we sin and sin and sin, and we get discouraged....but God doesn't care! our sins have been paid for already! He knows that, and so should we! God cares about the bigger picture, and we should never stop setting our eyes upon that picture too.

i think back to a speaker we had at ACF (one of the few i made it to....) and i remember him saying that whenever we fall...."God loves a rematch".

how cool is that?

as an aside, i never thought i'd ever post anything like this on the site. i feel inexplicably compelled to share this though.....what the heck is going on....
wow. you know what hurts?
biting your tongue so hard it feels it's half-gone.

but you know whats cool?
spitting enough blood into a sink that you feel like a vampire with an eating disorder.

Jun 1, 2003

added more links to people's pages for you blog stalkers to enjoy.
is it odd that i'm including links to people i don't think even know who i am?

i have friends. honest!
and they aren't imaginary this time!

i lead a sad sad life. whatever. more people need to start webpages. or at the very least, an online journal like a blog or xanga or something. it'll let me procrastinate more and work less.....it's getting later and i think my brain is starting to shut down for the night. before i go, i'll write a quick short story so i'll be amused when i read it tomorrow and realize i don't recall writing a short story.

this story is entitled - the boat.

jimmy walked around to the stern of the boat and examined the chipped and rotting name painted faintly on the hull; "mary".
"i wonder who mary was" he thought as he stood on the swaying dock, the sound of gentle waves lapping against the beach. the sun was shining brightly as he examined the boat further. it had clearly weathered several seasons alone, tethered to the dock and left to its own devices for the final days of it's ocean journey.
stepping cautiously to make sure it wa ssturdy, jimmy took a step onto the beaten hull of the boat, grabbing the dock for support as he hopped in quickly. Looking around, he almost felt a twinge of sorrow for the boat. It was apparent that in it's better days, it would have been a grand sight gliding through the water. Now however, it was nothing more than a hollow vessel, a floating carcass awaiting its inevitable demise.

Jimmy spun around quickly at the door of the cabin. He could have swore he had heard a scratching noise coming from behind the door. slowly, he moved towards the doorway.....clearly seeing the doorknob jiggle....then slowly turn.
"impossible!" he thought. no one could have survived last nights storm on this dingy boat! they'd have been thrown overboard in seconds! the door slowly creaked open.
"who the heck are you?" said the woman standing in the doorway.
"i'm Jimmy. i was just curious about this abandoned ship so i came aboard to look around. i didn't imagine anyone would be on it....are you homeless?"
"abandoned? what the hell are you talking about? i bought it last week. it's in pristine condition, what are you? blind?"
"pristine condition? but it's all faded and old looking!"
"wait a second...did you say ship?"
"yes ma'am....your ship looks like it's been tied out here to this dock for months. why haven't you taken care of it?"
"son. this here's a tent. and you're standing on a picnic table. making beach noises. are you one of those kids who do dope?"
"but it's a boat! called mary! look at the back!"
"what the.....did you paint that on my tent?!"
"uh....i gotta run. careful! listen! the seagulls are gonna get you!"
"WHAT SEAGULLS?! WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT??"
"SQUAW SQUAW!!"

jimmy ran into the woods of the park, never to be seen again. people say that sometimes, late at night, they can still here him making his dellusional seagull noises.
other people say those noises are just real seagulls.
i guess we'll never know the truth.

the end.