powers

so in another idea born of boredom, who would be interested in having people buy them clothes?

here's the pitch:

everyone meets together early afternoon, and we each pull a name out of a hat.

the mission is then to buy an outfit for that person, on a preset reasonable budget. reunite for dinner, enjoy new clothes and have a good laugh. to further make things interesting, maybe guys should shop for girls and vice versa.

anyone wanna do it?

i've been watching way too much TLC.

every time it just gets harder to say i'm sorry
feels like i'm losing all my heartfelt sincerity
these empty apologies are slowly killing me

how much longer must i wait before you take this weight?

i'm on my knees, begging you to save me
can i believe, in love enough to change me?

from highest highs to lowest lows, theres only down to go, it seems,
so far from giving you my all, as if i know i'll fall
i'm just so scared that one more time could be my last

that i'd exhaust your grace, that i would make, finally, my last mistake

and now i find i'm here again, nothing left to try, i'm spent
empty boxes, warring feelings, tears are shed up to the ceiling
played again on constant repeat, songs, and words, i long for your sweet
voice again, to reassure me, you've forgiven me completely

why do you take me back again, and again again again....

you are a runner and i am my father's son

i really enjoyed this article from stylus.com

soulseeking

i can totally relate to it, and i think it makes some excellent observations. things we all recognize but are too busy to stop and question.

true -- the ultimate message in the end may be "stop and smell the roses". but hey, sometimes the best advice is the cliched kind.

chromakey dreamcoat

The Perry Bible Fellowship

i haven't laughed this hard at a comic strip in a long...long time. some samples:

grounds for divorce

seems like my laundry list of things-to-do is starting to pile up. i always do this.

in particular, i have a lot of emails to catch up on. to anyone who's written me recently, i'm sorry i haven't written back yet. as mechanical and imperfect a means of communication email may be, i realize that in many ways its the only way i'm going to be able to keep in touch with a lot of amazing people. i'm working on it. i wish i was better, but trust me. i'm working on it.

i've been thinking a lot lately about promises. one of my favourite quotes about promises is by that loveable guy jack handy.

It's funny how two simple words, "I promise," will stall people for a while.

why are promises so important to us? is it a cultural thing? or a human thing? certainly it's universal, because as far as i know promises exist in every nation. it's such a simple concept, and yet such a difficult intangible. and although it's a stupid joke, the above quote is so true. those two words really do invoke a sense of hope, of belief in us that belies our cynical and jaded natures. do you find however, that we prioritize our promises according to who we've promised?

doesn't a promise seem less concrete if we're only promising something to ourselves? after all, who knows if you were to break it. only you.

what about promises to god? same thing i guess. sure, god knows too. but god knows everything, when has that ever stopped us?

promises to other people are the big one though. because those have actual consequences. when we don't come through for someone else....there's no running from failure.

what does it say about our character when we change our definitions of a promise depending on the circumstances? when we cut corners when no one's looking?

i'm guilty of making my share of promises that i couildn't keep. and there's no worse feeling in the world. something about letting people down, but not only that. knowing that in breaking a promise, you're letting yourself down too.

but maybe that's all growing up is. learning when to make a promise you can keep, and knowing when to be honest with yourself. saying what you really mean, and meaning what you say.

on the bright side, i randomly grabbed some junk mail for my afternoon toilet break. i don't know what the hymn sounds like, but as with most hymns, i only wish lyrics today spoke a fraction of the volumes those old stiffs could put to paper. simply gorgeous.

Standing on the promises of Christ my King,
Thro' eternal ages let His praises ring;
Glory in the highest, I will shout and sing,
Standing on the promises of God.

Standing on the promises that cannot fail,
When the howling storms of doubt assail,
By the living Word of God I shall prevail,
Standing on the promises of God.

Standing on the promises I cannot fall,
List'ning ev'ry moment to the Spirit's call,
Resting in my Savior as my all in all,
Standing on the promises of God.

~r. kelso carter

empty

learning to pray not just in the end, but from the start.

hang in there.

perfect speed

back from the bloc party show, and i must say i was impressed.

they sounded a lot tighter than i expected, and didn't lack at all for energy. the venue kind of blew (the docks) due to the horrible acoustics there, but the crowd was into it. asides from some pushing and shoving in good fun, i must say all in all, it was a kickass show. i'd for sure catch them again.

i caved and bought the cd. i'm a sucker for supporting bands, i don't know what it is. i would have bought the k'naan cd at the ryerson frosh concert too if i had any cash on me. goodness i'm broke.

i'm trying to decide what colour to paint my room. i'm leaning towards greys and blues, or maybe even a combination of both. i also kind of want to paint my ceiling, but i don't know if that's a good idea.....we'll see.

my goal for the week is to not spend any money. from now until saturday, i want to do nothing but free stuff (asides from driving). so who's with me?

the.new.fad

16Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. [2 Cor 4]

i should be asleep. my sunday morning is as hectic as they come, and starts at an hour where i've normally just slipped into REM sleep.

reading this above verse though, and through the many events and conversations that i have enjoyed today -- i realize that there are so many promises i keep forgetting to hold in my heart.

when i look at myself, i can see that i am wasting away. that much is for certain. life is a series of challenges, and i often find myself falling by the wayside. not to say i'm not getting by ok -- i like to think i am. but many occasions, i pause and really start to think that i'm squandering a glorious chance.....to live.

we're all wasting away. we can't stop it. that's just the nature of things.

but are we be renewed? are we being filled?

i sure want to think i am. because just letting my life waste away is a pretty lonely thing to conclude.

what renews you? what are you living for?

or perhaps more succinctly.....what are you dying for?

pagina dos

i know i said i didn't want an ipod.

apple has changed my mind.

in other news, blake vs. agassi was the best tennis match i've seen.....ever. now i want to play tennis.

after his ridiculous comeback win, agassi was asked "down two sets, did you ever doubt you can pull this thing off"?

he replied

"I question myself every day. That's what I still find motivating about this. I don't have the answers, I don't pretend that I do just because I won the match. Just keep fighting and maybe something good happens."

gold digger

for the vast majority of those who witnessed kanye freestyle his way into national controversy, these were probably the common reactions.

1) AMEN BROTHER
2) sigh. another misguided young black male.

a quote from new orleans may help put things in perspective:

"The guy who runs this building I'm in, emergency management, he's responsible for everything. His mother was trapped in St. Bernard nursing home, and every day she called him and said, 'Are you coming, son? Is somebody coming?' And he said, 'And yeah, Momma, somebody's coming to get you. Somebody's coming to get you on Tuesday. Somebody's coming to get you on Wednesday. Somebody's coming to get you Thursday. Somebody's coming to get you on Friday' — and she drowned Friday night. She drowned on Friday night," Mr. Broussard said.

now, we all know it's not the presidents job to save every granny in the state of louisiana. but it is indisputable that the help that arrived in the big easy was far too little, far too late.

was the cause racial? lets explore...

this whole situation really has been a microcosm of the divisions in american culture. be it racial, or socioeconomic -- the rifts between rich and poor, republican and democratic, the powerful and the powerless -- are growing wider everyday.

how else can you explain this ridiculous media exposure of poor black citizens left to fend for themselves in the middle of mayhem? or the media circus literally buzzing overhead capturing it all for the 24/7 news consortiums?

how is it, that though one of the most historical and treasured cities in the united states has been ravaged, the majority of the united states is watching the news as if there was just a horrible genocide in cambodia?

indeed, for those who've seen the movie "hotel rwanda", don't you find the raction of the general public eerily similar?

lets send some money. poor guys, i feel so bad for them. it's terrible whats going on down there.
so whats for dinner?

yes, this is a study in media and communications.
yes, this is a spectacular tragedy of massive proportions.

but what took so long for the help to arrive? was there a delay on mailing the president his memo? was it sent on a friday therefore requiring several business days to get to him?

michael moore lambasted mr.bush for sitting still after hearing news of the 9/11 terrorist attacks for a good half hour.

one can only wonder what people will say about this almost paid-vacation of foot dragging.

the fact of the matter is, there is no political brownie points to be won by posing heroically with the poor black ghetto in NO, or the white trailor trash in Ole' Miss.

there's no rush to help them. no rush to save them. no rush to acknowledge their plight.

racial accusations are never taken lightly. perhaps mr. west was a bit knee jerk in his reaction, but the truth of the situation is painfully obvious every day as i watch mainstream news channels propgate the same cliche's over and over again:

the chaos, looting and crime should be blamed on no one but the people present. they have no idea how barbaric they really are. silly rednecks with their shirts off, yelling at the camera. silly black gangsters (with their shirts off), stealing booze and food. and everybody...everybody it seems -- is shooting guns off in the air.

how did we get to this point? is it as simple as blaming the fat poor women who had to watch the white kid in his AE blasted jeans and lacoste polo board the first buses for evacuation? doesn't it seem too easy to just think that it must be some sort of civil unrest and complete and utter social breakdown in new orleans?

and so a nation shakes its head. it grieves. but it does not extend as full a helping hand as it should, because frankly -- like a homeless man begging for change -- those in this problem have really made things worse than they really are. this isn't our homeland.

it's bagdhad.
it's rwanda.
it's somolia.

how did we get here? how have we become so vague and irrelevant to each other that as long as the news doesn't affect our daily commute, it can no longer be personal? are we so emotionally devoid? so callous and jaded?

~

perhaps it's futile to say "the president is racist", "the news is biased and sensationalized", and "there is an unwritten caste system" are the roots of all our problems.

but sometimes, it's hard to deny the truth when it slaps you in the face. and what can we do, asides from change the channel, and hope fear factor is on to numb our minds from thinking too much.

as much as kanye jumped the gun on friday, i think deep down we know that he is simply reacting to the truth behind every chris rock and dave chappelle joke you've ever heard.

besides, maybe the college dropout knows a bit more about character judgment then we give him credit for.

"Now I ain't saying she a gold digger
But she ain't messing with no broke niggaz"

~kanye west


ain't that the truth.