had problems sleeping. now i'm awake, and it's 8:40am. goodness. i haven't been awake at 8:40 am in a long time. there's something eerie about the silence of a saturday morning. it's bright out, but i don't hear the cars or buses whizzing by.
strange.
there's so much hidden underneath the sheen of the day. not to get all american-beauty on you, but it's true what they say. stop and smell the roses.
i spent some time last night thinking about my friendships. analyzing what they mean to me, and what i mean to them. i think it's hard when you realize your friendships are starting to change. i've always been the type to consider someone a close friends, despite lack of communication or distance.
to me, intimacy in a friendship never goes away -- only people do. intimacy can always be captured again on contact, and the level of understanding, respect and bonding, never dissaptes. catching up is a formality to instant comfort. to me, you should always be able to think of a good friend and know that the more things change, the more things stay the same.
it's hard i think. what i've been realizing lately, is that you can have a lot of close friends. you can meet someone and in the course of a week -- if you mesh, and you spend enough time together -- you can be great friends. conversely, you can spend your whole life with somebody, and learn to be great friends.
but as close as somebody is to you, there's always going to be a litmus test that determines your relationship: do you get each other?
i'm learning everyday how important that question is. do they really get you?
i have lots of friends. lots of great, amazing, wonderful friends. i've been blessed beyond measure, as i've grown up with, and met honestly more people than i could ever ask for to help carry me through life.
but even of my closest friends, i'm realizing that only a few really "get" me. who share and understand who i am. who know why i say what i say, and do what i do, without me having to explain everything.
i've had conversations with friends where they were close, and well intentioned...but they just simply couldn't understand where i was coming from.
maybe i'm just neurotic. or melodramatic.
but there's nothing more comforting...more rewarding...more assuring and amazing, then knowing when someone just....really gets you. and not in the superficial faking-it way. i mean, there are times you can just tell.
and this isn't to say you shouldn't care about friends who you don't think get you as easily, or conventionally as others. what i'm saying is really cherish the ones who do. because they're truly a blessing.
so. you all know who you are.
thanks.
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